


Wrong or Right

by krazyk2314



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: F/M, Lots of Angst, Love Triangle, Loves Misha, Married to Jensen, Reader Insert, Some Fluff, Supernatural Conventions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-04
Updated: 2016-07-12
Packaged: 2018-05-31 04:18:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 33
Words: 41,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6455488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krazyk2314/pseuds/krazyk2314
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reader is married Jensen Ackles and they are deeply in love. However, even though they try to fight it, feelings start to develop between you and Misha. Will she stay with her husband, will she go with Misha?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ashley_Winchester_77](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashley_Winchester_77/gifts).



> The idea of this story was given to me by Ashley_Winchester_77. Thank you for reading, and I hope you like it!!

"But babe, what if they don't like me?" You asked, standing in your walk in closet in only your navy blue bra and underwear. You were scheduled to leave in thirty minutes, but you still needed to finish dressing and packing.

Jensen stood outside the closet, already dressed in a green Henley and dark jeans. You lost your train of thought as you stared at your husband of only a month. You still couldn't believe you had landed one of the most eligible bachelor's, the man who portrayed Dean Winchester so well. "Sweetheart, you know they will love you. They've been begging to meet you since we became engaged."

You chewed your knuckle, before grabbing a simple pair of skinny jeans and a light, flowing pink shirt. Throwing them on, you pulled out a pair of flats, slipping them onto your feet. "I know, but it's one thing wanting to meet me, and another to actually meet me." You said.

You were on your way to a Supernatural Convention, the first one you had ever been to. This one took place in Las Vegas, and Jensen was planning on having you meet the rest of the cast, before introducing you to the Supernatural fandom. You were petrified they wouldn't like you. They meant so much to Jensen, you needed them to accept you.

He grabbed your shoulders as you stepped out of the closet, placing a chaste kiss onto your forehead. "Knock it off. I won't have my amazing, beautiful wife this self conscious, and nervous. It will be fine, trust me. And Jared will be there too. You love Jared."

You sighed. You did love Jared, and he understood and helped with your shyness. "Fine. Let's get this show on the road." You told him.

Cliff was already parked outside. Jared and Jensen's personal bodyguard who went on these conventions with them, and drove them around. He gave you a big hug before opening the door for you. Once you were settled in, he turned to help Jensen pack the bags.

"Hey Y/N!" Jared's voice sounded from the front seat, and you jumped.

"Jared!" You scolded. "I didn't see you there."

"Sorry." He apologized, turning in his seat to face you. "You ready to meet the other family?"

You nodded, just as Jensen slid in next to you. Cliff turned the Suburban towards the airport, and Jensen grabbed your hand. "Relax."

The airport was crowded, and you clung to Jensen, as he waved at the various photographers. He and Jared paused for a moment, signing autographs, and you stood by Cliff, watching as your husband interacted with fans. You loved watching him like this, and in all truthfulness, you couldn't wait to see him in action at the convention. 

When he was finished, he grabbed your hand, and you made it to your plane with just enough time to spare. You were squished in between Jared and Jensen, but you didn't mind, it made you feel safe. 

"So what's going to happen when we get there?" You asked Jensen, trying to ignore Jared's snoring.

He tucked you into him, holding you tight. "We are gonna head to our motel, check in, then head on over to the convention. The concert is tonight, and I was planning on singing. So you will meet the other cast, then watch the concert from backstage."

You were excited to see the concert live. At your wedding Rob had sung a song for you, and you had fallen in love with his band. But you also couldn't wait to see Jensen in action. Many nights, while you were sitting in your living room, Jensen would mess around with his guitar, and end up singing you a song or two. And you absolutely loved it. "I can't wait." You told him, just as the captain announced your decent into Las Vegas.

If you had thought the Vancouver airport was horrible, this one was a million times worse. Tourists from every walk of life crowded the hallways, and you couldn't help but stare at some of the outfits people were wearing.

Jensen had your hand firmly grasped in his while Cliff and Jared followed behind, Cliff hauling the luggage cart. There was a Suburban waiting for you at the entrance, and you climbed in while the boys loaded the car.

Then you were off, traveling down the busy streets of Las Vrgas. You watched as Palm Trees flew by, buildings that were tall and unique catching your eye.

"Y/N, you ever been to Vegas before?" Jared asked you, and you shook your head.

"No, it was too far away. You told them. Growing up in (your home town), you had never had the chance to travel that much.

"We will come back. When we have time for just us." Jensen promised you, before you were being dropped off at the MGM.

Jared and Jensen went to check in, while you stared in awe. It was huge inside, full of slot machines, and other gambling games. You were so fascinated that you didn't even notice when the boys had returned. 

"Okay. We have about thirty minutes here, then we need to head over." Jensen said, looking at his watch. The four of you piled into the elevator, pressing the button for floor twenty. 

Your room was massive. A king sized bed was placed in the middle of the room, a couch and chairs towards the window, which featured a balcony. Ecerything was done in champagne tones, making it very rich and opulent looking. The bathroom held a jacuzzi tub, along with a marble shower and counter tops.

Placing your bags down on the bed, Jensen came and wrapped his arms around your waist, nuzzling his head into your neck as you stared outside at all the views. "What do you think?" He asked you. You leaned back as he started to press kisses against your bare skin, moaning. "I don't think I can ever get used to this."

He stopped, looking down at you, his eyes dark with lust. "You mean this?" He said, kissing you again. "Or this?" He asked, sweeping his hand to show the view in front of him.

"Both." You answered. "I can't believe we are really married, that I can call you mine. Kiss those plump lips whenever I want. But I also don't think I will ever get used to living in the type of houses we do, having someone drive us, having a motel room like this. Knowing woman throw themselves at you."

He went to answer you, but a knock on the door stopped him. "Jensen, we need to go." Cliff said. "Can we talk more later?" He asked, holding his hand out. You nodded, before following him out the door.

The Casino where the convention was being held was only a ten minute ride, and soon the Suburban was pulling up at the back. The four of you climbed out, with Cliff leading the way. You were taken through multiple hallways, past rooms where you caught glimpses of fans sitting in wait of the concert. Cliff stopped in front of a door, pulling it open and stepping aside.

"Here we go." Jensen told you, smiling, and you nodded, holding his hand tightly.


	2. The Concert

You nervously followed Jensen into the room. It wasn't as if everyone would be a stranger, you had met many at your wedding. But there quite a few you didn't know, and they were all in their element. 

The fist thing you noticed upon entering, was how boisterous and rowdy the room was. A group of ten to fifteen people were standing around, laughing, drinking and joking. Jared headed straight into the group, giving Rob, and all the others big bear hugs. Jensen stayed back, his attention focused on you.

He moved his hand from yours, placing it on the small of your back, leaning down until his lip was pressed against your ear. "I can feel how tense you are. Relax, they will love you." He finished, before pressing a kiss to your temple and standing back. "Besides, if anyone should be nervous, it should be me. I'm getting ready to sing to hundreds of women."

It was what he expected, the comment relaxed you. "Hey Jensen, stop hogging Y/N to yourself!" A petite, red-haired woman yelled. 

"That's Ruth." He told you, guiding you forward. Soon you were surrounded, each person trying to get to meet you, and you started to feel a little overwhelmed. 

"Woah guys, let her catch her breath." Jensen chastised them, before he left and went to check out the sound with Rob.

"Sorry Y/N. We've just been begging Jensen to bring you along ever since the wedding." A beautiful woman, with short brown hair said. "I'm Kim by the way."

One by one they started introducing themselves to you, except for Rob, his band,  Mark and Rich, whom you already knew. "It's nice to meet all of you." You told them just as a convention worker announced the concert was starting.

Everyone around you started hustling around, messing with their ear pieces, rushing out the other door. Jensen came up to you. "Why don't you follow me. I have the perfect viewing spot." He told you, leading you out the door, where a big black curtain hung. On each side was a huge screen, showing the beginning of the concert. Jensen showed you a chair, and you sat, taking the earphones he handed you.

He left, and people would come over and talk to you in between sets. Your favorite person soon became Brianna. She was so bubbly and outgoing, you loved her immediately. 

She left to sing, and Jensen was talking to Jared over in the corner, which left you by yourself to enjoy the concert. You were tapping your foot, almost humming along to the music when a masculine voice sounded from beside you, scaring you in the process.

"Do you mind if I sit here?" A deep voice, though not as deep as Jensen's, said. You nodded as you looked up, before you got trapped in a pair of blue eyes. They were a beautiful shimmering blue, with so much light and kindness shining through. You realized you were staring and you blushed.

He sat down next to you, and you knew who he was. He was Misha, who played the Angel Cas on the show. You were becoming quite a fan of the show, and the Angel was quickly becoming your favorite with his awkward tendencies. "Hi, I'm Misha. You must be Y/N." He said, holding out his hand, and you took it, jumping at the slight shock that traveled through your system. His hand was warm, and callused, and you held on a little longer than necessary. 

"Hi Misha, it's nice to finally meet you." You replied, getting caught up in his slightly off tilt smile. It was awkward, but adorable. You shook your head at yourself, you were married to Jensen, you shouldn't be this flustered by one of his friends.

"I'm sorry about missing your wedding. I couldn't get a flight back from Nicaragua." He apologized. 

"It's okay, I understand." You told him, turning your attention back to the screen where Louden Swain was performing Mama's Jam. You watched in silence, enjoying the performance until you felt a pair of arms wrap around you from behind.

"I'm next." Jensen whispered into your ear. "I see you met Misha."

Misha nodded. "I had to come over and introduce myself to your lovely wife. But you better watch out, I might end up stealing her away from you." He teased, and you froze. You knew he was teasing, but this man had you flustered. 

Jensen pressed his lips to yours, before standing up. "I would like to see you try." He answered, before he moved towards the slit in the curtain. You watched the screen, laughing as you heard the scream of all the women in the crowd.

"He's quite the heart throb, isn't he?" Misha asked you, but when you glanced at him, you found him staring at you with an almost hungry look.

"Yes he is. I can't wait to see him perform. He sings for me at home, but this is different." You rambled, his direct gaze unnerving you.

"Of course he does. What can't that man do?" Misha teased, before the two of you turned to look at the screen, where Jensen started singing Whipping Post. 

You loved it, you were in awe of how amazing he was, that this Rockstar was your sweet and loving husband. When the song finished, you ran over to the curtain, ready to meet him when he came back.

He stepped down, his face covered in a fine sheen of sweat. "Jensen, that was amazing!!" You yelled, throwing yourself into his arms. He held you tightly for a moment, before letting go. 

"Hey Jensen, are you going to do the group song with us?" Richard asked, and Jensen nodded.

"You gonna be okay down here by yourself?" He asked you, and you nodded.

"Don't worry Jensen, I will stay here and keep her company." Misha's voice came from beside you, and you almost jumped when he placed a hand on your shoulder. 

"Thanks man." Jensen said, joining up with the rest of the group. You and Misha went back to stand by the video screen. The two of you were silent for a moment, before Misha spoke again. 

"Listen, I just need to say this. I don't want anything bad to happen between you and Jensen. Hell, he's like family to me." He started, and you stared at him, waiting to see where he was going with this. "But, and I'm not sure if you felt it, but I felt this instant attraction to you, a spark. And no matter how much I want to ignore it, I can't. It was too strong, and it's still there, pulling me to you, like a moth to a flame."


	3. Sunday

Your mouth open, you stood there staring at Misha. You couldn't believe what he had just told you. Here you were, a married woman, one married to one of his best friends. And he comes out and tells you that he already has some feelings for you.

Before you could answer, an arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you tight to a warm and sturdy chest. "I see you met Misha. The slacker who couldn't even make it to our wedding." Jensen teased, not noticing the awkwardness between the two of you.

"Yeah, I finally came over and introduced myself. You have a lovely wife. You better watch out, or I might just take her from you." Misha teased back, but in his blue eyes you could see a hint of truth, and it scared you but also excited you at the same time.

"You hear that sweetheart? He thinks he could take you from me." Jensen said near your ear, and acting on impulse, you turned in his grasp and kissed him passionately on the lips.

"Never." You told him, glancing back to see a hurt look on Misha's face, making you feel bad. "But don't worry Misha. We can still be friends." You told him, holding your hand out. He grasped it tightly, and you tried to ignore the lightning bolt that sizzled from his hand to yours at the touch.

"It's time to call it a night." Jensen told you, and you nodded. Placing his hand on the small of your back, he guided you away from a staring Misha, and out of the emptying room, into the hallway where Cliff and Jared were already waiting. The four of you made your way outside, where the Suburban was already waiting. Sliding into the backseat, Jensen followed you in. Jared climbed into the front, and you were off. 

Staying quiet, you stared out the window, your mind in a whirl as you tried to forget the fact that you had just been seriously attracted to a man that was not your husband. You were startled back into the here and now, when Jensen leaned over and whispered into your ear. "Is everything okay?"

You nodded. "Just a little tired. Too much excitement from seeing my rock star husband." You told him, giving him a small smile. Grabbing your hand, he gave it a gentle squeeze.

Once you were back in your room, you changed into your pajama's, which was one of Jensen's old Cowboys jerseys. Sliding under the covers, you watched as he got undressed, leaving his boxers and his undershirt on. You realized how lucky you were, how amazing and handsome he was. But then, without your permission, your mind turned back to the blue eyed temptation, and how handsome he was. Not like Jensen, who was a heady mixture of the boy next door plus model. Misha was handsome in his own way, with his awkwardness, but compelling eyes, and sweet smile. 

Groaning, you slid further under the sheets, noticing that Jensen was frowning at you. "Everything okay Y/N?"

You nodded, closing your eyes as he slid in next to you, spooning you. "Just a stupid headache." You answered, and you felt him rubbing your hip soothingly. 

"Well, hopefully you can sleep it off tonight. Because tomorrow is going to be a busy day." He told you, and you nodded.

As you slowly drifted to sleep, your thoughts kept drifting between the wonderful man who was holding you tightly, and the one who sent sparks flying through your body.

_______________________________________________

The next morning, you were gently shook awake. "Hey, sweetheart. Time to wake up."

You moaned, burrowing farther under the covers. Jensen chuckled, before grabbing them in both hands and yanking them away from you. "I don't think so. If you want breakfast, we need to go, soon. The gold panel starts in an hour and a half."

You groaned, but did as you were told, sitting up. You stumbled your way into the bathroom, slamming the door in Jensen's face.

Quickly going through your morning routine, you were ready in less than a half an hour. Jensen was sitting on the bed, thumbing through the channels as he waited for you. Seeing you, he stood up, and the two of you made your way down the hallway, just as Jared and Cliff stepped out of their rooms.

 

"Morning everyone." Jared said, giving everyone a hearty slap on the back.

Before you knew it you were back in that small little room that everyone called the green room, even though it was cream colored with different tones of tan carpet. The room was empty, and you glanced at Jensen confused. "Where is everyone?" 

"They don't show up until later. This is just me and Jared. You can stay in here, watch the big screen, or stand with Cliff on the side. Up to you." Jensen told you, as Adam, one of the conventions managers told them they had five minutes.

"If it wouldn't be too much trouble, I'd like to stand by Cliff." You said nervously, waiting for the bodyguard's approval. 

He shrugged. "I'm okay with it."

You hugged Jensen and Jared, wishing them good luck, and walked outside the black curtains with Cliff. The room was big, much bigger than you had imagined, but most of the chairs were empty. "Where is everyone?" You leaned in to ask, not missing the fact that many of the fans were looking your way and pointing. 

"This is just for Gold ticket holders. This room will be packed for the second panel." 

Just then the curtain opened, and Adam stepped out, introducing the boys. You watched mesmerized as Jared and Jensen joked and talked to the audience, totally at ease and comfortable with their fans. You loved seeing Jensen like this, and you couldn't wait to see how the autographs and photo op sessions would go.

You felt like Jensen's shadow, following him down the hallway as he moved from one place to another. You could hear girls and grown women giggling as he walked by, and you smiled at them. Jensen was up first for photo ops, and you stood in the corner as women man handled your husband. At first you were a little jealous, but then you calmed down. These women were having their moment of glory, while you had the real thing to go home to at night. 

You were completely relaxed, having fun, joking with the cameraman during breaks, when they announced a new photo op, one with Jensen and Misha. Immediately, you stiffened up, wondering if he would do or say something again.


	4. Sunday Part 2

You heard them announcing that the Cockles photo op would happen in ten minutes. You glanced at Jensen, who had just finished up his solo op and was heading your way. "Cockles?" You asked him.

"Yeah, it's a photo with me and Misha in it. I'm going to go use the restroom. Why don't you stay here, hang out with Chris, and I will be back shortly." He told you, pressing a kiss to your temple before leaving the room. You glanced around the room, surprised at how fast it had emptied out. Fans weren't allowed in yet, and most of the staff had left to take a quick break. Chris was sitting at the computer table, his cellphone pressed to his ear.

Turning to the snack table, you grabbed a water and a granola bar, getting ready to take a sip when you felt a presence behind you. "Hey Y/N," Misha said from behind you, and you jumped, spilling a little bit down your chin. He chuckled, before grabbing a napkin from the table. You held your hand out, expecting him to hand it to you, but instead he stepped closer, his eyes searching yours. They seemed to have changed color since last night, from a deep navy blue, to one that you could only see in the reflection of a high mountain lake. You were mesmerized, and stood there, waiting to see what he would do. 

Raising his hand deliberately slow, he pressed the rough napkin to your chin, gently wiping away the moisture that had collected there. Your breath catching, you could only stand there as he moved it up, pressing it against your lip. There was only the slightest barrier of paper product between you and his callused hands. You waited to see what he would do next, your eyes darting over to where Chris sat, but he was gone, his chair empty.

You couldn't help yourself, your tongue slipped out, licking the inside of your lip, but you could tell Misha felt it, because he squinted his eyes. Before you could figure out what he was going to do next, you heard Cliff's booming voice, and Jensen's answering it. Jumping back, you took a deep breath, knowing your cheeks were red. Misha crushed the napkin in his hand, and you watch as he stuffed it into the pocket of his dark blue jeans.

"Misha, you're already here!" Jensen exclaimed, patting his friend on the back, as you stood there trying to catch your composure. "Y/N, everything okay?" Jensen asked, placing his hand on your shoulder.

You smiled at him, turning to face everyone. "Yeah, I just spilled my water, and I was cleaning it up." You answered.

Chris came back in. "Alright you two. Let's get this show on the road." You studied him, wondering what he had seen, but he was busy messing with his camera, never giving you a second look.

"Hey, Chris, can we do one with the three of us?" Jensen asked. "Since someone couldn't make it to our wedding, I thought it would be nice."

Chris nodded, and Jensen pulled you over to the backdrop, placing you in between him and Misha. Jensen wrapped his arm around your shoulder, and you felt Misha wrap his around your waist. You tensed a little at the touch, his hand grasping your waist, his fingers brushing your stomach. You smiled for Chris, but in your mind, you were beside yourself. Here you were, smack dab between your husband, who you loved more than anyone, and Misha, whose touch seemed to ignite a fire deep within you.

Before you knew it the picture was done, and you were stepping away, back to your spot in the corner, just as the convention crew started letting the fans in. Distracting yourself with observing the fans, you quickly moved from your spot, going over and saying hi to as many as possible, making your way out of the room, and down the line.

You soon started to enjoy yourself, learning facts about the people who adored your husband, blushing from all the compliments you received. The fans were amazing, so sweet, and so excited to get their picture taken, that soon the line was ending, and you hadn't realized how much time had gone by.

"Y/N, it's time to go." Cliff said, coming up beside you. Nodding you went with him, where Jensen was already waiting for you outside the door. Misha was nowhere to be seen, and you weren't sure if you were relieved or disappointed.

"Where to now?" You asked, as Jensen intertwined his fingers with yours. Pulling you close to him, he tucked you into his shoulder as you navigated the hallway.

"The afternoon panel. Then autographs, and we are done." He answered, giving your shoulder a gentle squeeze. You stopped walking, pulling him to a stop to. He stared down at you, wondering what was wrong. Standing on your tiptoes, you cupped your hand to Jensen's slightly whiskered face, before placing your lips to his smooth and plump ones. It was short, and chaste, but the contact was comforting, and reminded you that you were deeply in love with him.

"What was that for?" He asked, as you heard the whispered conversations, and saw the fingers that were pointing your way. You hadn't exactly realized you were in the middle of the hallway, with fans surrounding you. 

"Because I can. And because I love you." You told him, feeling a little guilty and ashamed of yourself with how you acted around Misha.

"I love you too." He said, squeezing your hand, before a forced cough from Cliff had the two of you moving again.

You once again found yourself in that small room, where Rob, Rich and the band were hanging out. They were just throwing their trash away, getting ready to head back out to the stage. You disentangled your hand from Jensen's, and rushed forward to give each man a quick hug. You absolutely loved these two men, and wished you had been able to spend a little bit of time with them.

"Don't worry Y/N, I'll see you again soon." Rob whispered in your ear, and squealing, you stepped back.

"Are you serious? Where?" You asked him.

He looked around, making sure no one was looking. "Well, it's kind of a surprise, but I will be back on the set of Supernatural this week." 

You gave him another quick hug. "That's amazing! Maybe we could do lunch, or dinner while you're in town." You told him, and he promised that he would. Soon they left, and it was just you, Jensen and Jared.

Jensen went to grab a bottle of water, and Jared came over to stand next to you, offering a piece of his candy. You shook the offer off, not wanting any sugar. "Well, how are you liking it so far?" He asked you.

"I love it. The fans are amazing, and I love the atmosphere." You answered, just as Jensen came back over.

"See, was there anything to be nervous about?" Jensen teased, and you slapped his shoulder.

The three of you went out to the back of the stage, waiting for their call up song. You were going to stay behind the curtain this time, because Jensen wanted to formally introduce you to the fans.

Soon, their song started playing, and they rushed onto the stage, leaving you to watch the big screens, laughing as they both danced around, playing musical instruments, Jensen singing with Rob. You could see why the fans loved the conventions so much.

As you stood there watching, your arms crossed across your chest, you heard footsteps approaching. Glancing over your shoulder, your heart skipped a beat when you noticed Misha.

"How's it going?" He asked over the laughter of the fans.

"They are amazing." You answered, gazing back at the screen. He came to stand next to you, both of you watching the screen silently.

"So, Y/N." Misha started. "I know you're married to Jensen. I know he's my best friend, and I don't want to hurt him. But I also know that there is something between us, something I've never felt before. Please tell me you feel it too."

"And why does it matter if I do? Because I'm married, happily. Even if I felt something for you, I could never act on those feelings. I could never do that to Jensen. I already feel guilty enough as it is." You told him, even though you wanted to taste his lips, see if his kiss excited you as much as his touch did.

"So you do feel something." He replied, stepping close, so close you could feel your chest brushing his, his feet on the side of yours. He radiated heat, and you took a deep breath, breathing in the heady aroma that was uniquely Misha.

Before you could do anything, Misha's unyielding lips were pressed hard against your own. Where Jensen's lips were soft and plump, Misha's were chapped. It was rough, his hands wrapped tightly in your hair, one hand at the base of your neck, and you moaned, opening your mouth to his. Before you could wrap your arms around him, he was stepping back, a victorious look gleaming in his eyes.

"I knew it. I knew you felt something too." He told you, just as Jensen came from the stage.

"Y/N? We're ready for you." He said, holding his hand out to you.


	5. Lunch Date

"Babe." You heard Jensen say through your sleep induced haze. "Babe, I've got to go to work."

"Mmm." You mumbled, not wanting to leave the warm cocoon of your nest. You hadn't arrived back to your house in Vancouver until early morning, and you wanted to sleep for at least a couple more hours.

"Love you. I will see you later." He whispered, kissing your temple before leaving, and you didn't even hear the door shut before you were asleep once again.

The next time you woke up, the sun was shining through the window, almost blinding you. Groaning, you threw the covers off, deciding you couldn't laze around in bed any longer. Slipping from the soft and spacious bed, you went down the stairs to the kitchen, pouring yourself a cup of coffee. It was a couple of sips in before you were awake enough to notice a note laying next to the coffee pot.

"Don't forget, you promised to come to set today, to have lunch with me and the guys. Love you, see you soon. Jensen."

That's right. In your sleep induced fog, you had completely forgotten that you had made these plans last week. Jensen knew you were feeling restless around the house, still unused to living in Vancouver part time, and he thought this was a way for you to get around, meet new people, get used to the people he spent hours with each day.

Your mind inexplicably wandered to the question if Misha would be there. The last time you had seen Misha, was last night, right after he had kissed you. You were standing there, in shock, Misha behind you, Jensen with his hand outstretched in front of you. You had taken Jensen's hand, letting him pull you up to stage, where the thunderous applause of the fans had pulled you out of the frazzled state you had been in.

Jensen had given you a quick kiss, much to the crowds pleasure, before whispering in your ear. "Is everything okay? Misha wasn't being too pushy was he?"

You slightly shook your head, pasting on a smile, and waving to the crowd. Jared let you sit in his seat, and you stayed on the stage for a couple of minutes, talking to the fans, letting your picture be taken. When you were done, you had gone back down, but Misha was nowhere to be seen, and you weren't sure how you felt about that.

During the trip home, Jensen had given you many worried glances, but you pretended to fall asleep on the plane, wanting to push the incident as far away from your mind as you could. But now, this morning, knowing you were more than likely to run into him, brought it all back, and you started feeling sick to your stomach. How could you kiss another man, especially a man that was your husband's friend? You couldn't even look at yourself in the mirror, you were so horrified at yourself.

You knew what you had to do. You would arrive early on set, find Misha, and set him straight, telling him you loved your husband, and you would never do anything to harm your relationship. Your mind made up, you felt much better, and you left your now cold cup of coffee on the table, making your way back to your spacious bathroom, where you started getting ready for the day.

After a long, luxurious shower, you stood there in just a towel, contemplating your wardrobe. You wanted to look strong, but at the same time you didn't want to look as if you were trying too hard. You finally decided on a pair of slim, dark tinted jeans, with a fitted band t-shirt. Jensen loved when you wore this outfit, and you guessed you were trying to make up to him, even though he didn't know anything was wrong. 

Topping the outfit off with a pair of sneakers, you went back into the bathroom, adding the finishing touches to your makeup, going for a natural look. Your hair went part way back, with little wisps floating around your face. Feeling put together, you went down to the garage, where your jeep sat. Jensen had laughed at you, telling you to get rid of the jeep, and he would buy you a new car. Or better yet, hire you a driver. But you loved your classic jeep, and you refused to get rid of it. You had it hauled all the way to Vancouver, leaving it here when the two of you went back to Texas. You loved the freedom it provided, never having to rely on someone for a ride.

It was still chilly in Vancouver, so the top stayed on, but you had the windows cracked as you drove down the busy streets, making the thirty minute trek to the studio. Pulling up to the security window, you smiled at Dave, who had been nice to you from the moment you had met him.

"Good morning Mrs. Ackles. Go on through." He told you, pressing a button to open the gate. You made a couple of turns, before pulling into the lot saved for the Supernatural cast and crew. Jensen's trailer was across from it, and grabbing your purse, you made your way over to the gigantic trailer. Knocking on the door, you weren't surprised when no one answered. After all, you were half an hour early. Turning around, you glanced right, then left, deciding which way to go, when a costume girl walked by.

"Excuse me Miss. Can you tell me where I might find Jensen?" You asked, and she gave you a suspicious look.

"Yeah right. Like I haven't fallen for that before." She laughed at you, before walking away.

"I would have thought everyone would know who you are by now." A familiar voice teased from beside you, and Misha walked into your vision. "She's going to be so embarrassed when she finds out she gave Jensen's wife the cold shoulder."

"I don't mind." You replied, glancing around to see if anyone else was around.

"Your hubby is busy filming over in studio B. He should be done in about 20 minutes." Misha explained. "I could get someone to unlock his trailer for you, if you want."

You took a deep breath, steeling your spine, knowing this might be a difficult conversation. "Actually, I came a little early, hoping to run into you."

Misha's raised an eyebrow at that, biting his bottom lip, and you squirmed in your spot, remembering how that lip felt against yours. "Well, my trailers over here."

"Not for that. I need to talk to you." You answered, but you were flustered, and he could tell.

"Still, my trailer?" He asked, pointing to the left. Nodding you followed him to a much smaller trailer, but still nice. He opened the door and stepped aside, letting you climb the stairs first. Once inside, you stepped to the right, waiting for him to enter. 

Once he was next to you, he shut the door, locking it, which surprised you. "Never know who might show up." He explained, before grabbing your shoulders, shoving you into the door, roughly, but not too hard, before his lips captured yours.


	6. Making a Promise

At first you stood there motionless, letting yourself feel the press of Misha's lips against yours, the way his tongue fought for entrance into your mouth, swiping against your lips, until you gave in. His hands were pressed against the door above your head, effectively trapping you between it, and his hard body, but you weren't sure you minded. As you moaned into his mouth, he groaned, before stepping back, and you almost fell down without the support of his body against yours. He took a couple of steps back, creating a bigger rift between the two of you.

"I'm sorry. I promised myself I wouldn't do that again. After last night, I knew what I was doing was wrong, and I promised that I would step back, that I was only hurting a person I care about very much. But seeing you, here, today, I forgot all about it. I had to feel your lips against mine, at least one more time." He told you, running his hands through his already messed up hair.

"Misha, I..." You started, but he stopped you.

"I can understand if you hate me, if you never want to see me again." He told you, turning his back, moving to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water from the sink.

"Misha, I don't hate you. But I did come here to tell you that we can't act on these feelings that we may be feeling. I'm married, and to your best friend!" You told him, and he casted his eyes down, ashamed of himself.

"I know, don't you think I'm beating myself up over this?" He exclaimed. "I've just never met anyone like you, and as soon as I met you, I knew there was some sort of connection between us."

You sighed, because you had felt the exact same thing. "I know, I felt it too. But, no matter what I felt, I can't do this to Jensen. He doesn't deserve this." You told him, tears pooling up in your eyes at the thought of the pain this would cause him.

"What can we do? I'm not sure I can be around you and keep my hands off?" Misha answered, sitting down on the couch, clutching his bottle of water tightly. 

You sat down in a chair, far enough away that the two of you could control your urges. "Well, we are going to have to work hard. Because we will be together a lot. And I don't want Jensen to find out. Got it?"

He nodded, and you glanced at your watch. "I need to go. Jensen should be done by now. And Misha, I'm sorry. If I wasn't already married, I..." You hesitated. "I really do feel something for you. And I know saying that won't make this any easier, but please know this has nothing to do with how I feel about you."

He nodded, not saying anything as you opened the door, and rushed down the steps, colliding with a very hard chest. "Woah, careful Y/N!" Jensen chided, his arms tight around you as he kept you from falling to the ground.

You blushed bright red, from being in such a rush that you had almost fallen, but also because he had just caught you leaving Misha's trailer.

"Jensen! I'm sorry, I was just on my way to meet you." You blabbered, trying to hide the fact that you were feeling guilty.

"I figured that. I got done a little early so I thought I'd wait for you by my trailer. You must have gotten here even earlier." He said, wrapping his arm around your shoulder, guiding you away from his trailer, towards the food tent.

"Yeah, I wanted to surprise you. But I ran into Misha, and he said you were still shooting." You answered.

"I'm glad you're getting along with Misha so well. It means a lot to me that you get along with him, just like with Jared." He said, just as the tent came in view. Before you could answer, two big arms were wrapped around your waist from behind, lifting you off the ground.

You squealed, looking Jensen's way, only to see him laughing. "How's it hanging Y/N?" Jared said from behind you.

"Jared! Put me down!" You ordered, and he followed through.

"I'm glad Ackles here was able to talk you into coming down from lunch. He keeps you to himself way too much." Jared replied as the three of you made your way to the buffet lines.

"Hey! She is my wife after all!" Jensen argued, but Jared just shoved him, and you could only laugh at their brotherly teasing. When you had first gotten together with Jensen, you had been worried about how the three of you would work out, but you loved Jared, he loved you, and the three of you were very close. 

"And she's my best friend!" Jared fake snapped back, and you became so enraptured with their teasing you forgot all about your meeting with Misha.

"I thought I was your best friend!" Jensen said, mocking a hurt heart, and you couldn't take it anymore, snorting laughter busted out of your mouth, silencing both men.

You couldn't control it, and you were bent over the table, laughing so hard you couldn't breathe. Finally, wiping tears from your eyes, you took a deep breath, only to be taken breathless again when Jensen surprised you by capturing his lips were your own. You stayed still for a moment, a little embarrassed to be kissing him in public, but soon you were wrapping your arms around him, pulling his body tight to yours.

"Hey guys, don't you think that's a little too much?" You heard Jared tease, and you reluctantly stepped away. 

"Sorry, got carried away." Jensen told his friend. "I just love it when she laughs like that." 

You blushed, still unused to Jensen's compliments, and his unconditional love for you.

"No big deal man. I just didn't want anyone losing their lunch because of your PDA." Jared said, slapping him on the back. You watched as Jensen's eyes lit up as they looked over you.

"Misha! About time you got your ass in here!" Jensen cracked at Misha.

You turned to see Misha slowly making his way towards your group, his steps uncertain, and you hated that you were the reason behind it.

"Hey, what's up?" Jared asked, noticing the subtle change in Misha.

He gave you a hard look before answering. "Just a little tired I guess. And hungry, where's the food?"

After that, Jared and Jensen let it drop, and the four of you began filling your plates, Jensen introducing you to the crew as you passed them by. Soon, you were sitting at one of the long tables, Jensen next to you, with Misha and Jared across from you. 

"So Misha I wanted to thank you for keeping Y/N company while I finished up the scene today." Jensen started, and the two of you jumped.

You stared down at your food as Misha answered. "No problem. I enjoy spending time with Y/N."

"Good, that's great. Because I was hoping you and Jared would come over for a BBQ this weekend. We don't have a convention, and I thought it was a perfect chance to just relax and hang out."

You looked up at Jensen in surprise. He hadn't even mentioned anything to you, and he shrugged his shoulders as if to say he was sorry.

"I'm not sure." Misha answered.

"Come on, you have to come." Jared ordered. "Maybe we can talk some of the other cast into coming. It will be fun."

"Yeah sure." He gave in, giving you an apologetic look.

"Sounds like fun." You exclaimed, knowing it would be, but wondering what it meant for you and Misha, and your pledge to stay away from each other.


	7. Ready for Fun

Glancing around the kitchen, you wiped your hands on the towel, making sure everything was ready to go for tonight. You had the potato salad cooling in the fridge, along with the mixings for a regular salad. The potatoes were wrapped in foil, ready to be thrown on the grill, along with the different selections of meat. Dessert was made, the beans and corn were simmering on the stove.

You had spent the last day and a half getting ready for this event, and you were really looking forward to it. It was your first time entertaining in your house, and you needed everything to be perfect. You weren't sure what anybody liked to snack on, so you had made a little bit of everything, and you were now worried you might have gone a little overboard.

Biting your lip, you opened the fridge, making sure the pies still looked okay, and that you hadn't forgotten any of the condiments. You were so busy double checking everything, you didn't noticed Jensen's quiet footsteps coming into the kitchen.

"Babe, you need to quit worrying. Everything will be fine." He whispered into your ear as he pressed his front tightly to your back, wrapping his arms around you waist. You leaned back so your head was pressed to his chest, leaving your neck open to him. He leaned down, pressing small kisses all along your neckline.

"Jensen, we can't do this now. The guys will be here soon." You protested, but it soon turned into a moan as his hands slowly lifted your shirt up, and you shivered at the skin to skin contact, needing more.

"I don't care." He muttered, nibbling on your earlobe. "I haven't seen you hardly at all this week."

"Later." You promised, your resolve crumbling fast, but you made on last attempt to move away from him. He took it as an opportunity, spinning you so your chest was pressed tightly to his, your nipples tightening at the contact. His hands left your belly, skimming around the side before grasping the globes of your butt, pushing you tightly into the bulge in his pants.

"Jensen, you better go calm yourself down." You told him, but your hands were saying a different story, wrapping themselves around his shoulders, pulling him in tightly, moving his mouth from your neck to connect with your lips. 

Your hands moved up, running through his hair, just as the doorbell rang. "They can wait." He murmured against your lips, giving your butt a tight squeeze.

Sighing, you detached yourself from him, cupping your hand on his cheek. "Jensen, that's rude. Save it for tonight." You told him, slapping his rear before you left the room. Giving him a chance to cool down, you opened the door, smiling wide as Jared stood there with a bottle of Jensen's favorite whiskey in his hands. 

"Jared!" You exclaimed, throwing your arms around him, giving him a tight hug. Taking the bottle of whiskey from him, you stepped aside so he could come in, and it was then you noticed he wasn't alone. A pretty brunette was standing next to him, dressed casually in a pair of faded jeans, and a sweater. "Y/N, this is Gen. She just started on Supernatural. Gen, this is Y/N, Jensen's wife." 

The two of you stared at each other a moment, your smile growing wide as you realized Jared had finally found himself a girl. You grabbed her by the arm, surprising her, planning on dragging her into the house and learning all about her, but you were interrupted by male voices coming up the sidewalk.

"Rob, Rich! I didn't know you guys were going to make it!" You exclaimed, excited beyond belief.

"There's one more. He's just being slow." Rich teased, just as Mark came strolling up your sidewalk.

"Hello Love." He told you, giving you a tight hug.

You stepped aside, giving them all room. "Come on in guys." You told them, but you were still searching for one more, and you chided yourself for it.

The guys followed you into the house, where you lead them into the kitchen. "Y/N, I love your house." Gen told you, as she glanced all around. By then Jensen was back, somewhat cooler than a minute ago.

"Hey guys. Glad you could make it." Jensen told everyone, giving out hugs, and slaps on the back. It was then the doorbell rang again. Excusing yourself, you opened the door, only to be met with a very familiar pair of blue eyes.

"Hello Y/N." He told you, his eyes drinking in the sight of you, while you caught yourself doing the same. You had tried so hard to not think about him over the week. You had done well, but one sight of his blue eyes had your resolve crumbling, and you wanted to taste his lips upon yours, one more time.

"Hi Misha." You answered, not moving, your hand against the door frame, both of you staring at each other.

"Y/N, everyone is outside. Where's the lighter? Oh, hey Misha!" Jensen said, coming around the corner. You stepped aside, letting Misha through the door.

"I'll go go get it." You told Jensen, wanting to be away and by yourself before you did something stupid.


	8. The BBQ

You had last remembered seeing a lighter in the garage, having placed a pack of them there during your last shopping trip. Jensen and Misha made their way into the living room where everyone else was already lounging on the furniture, waiting for dinner. You bypassed the room, heading through the kitchen, into the garage, before shutting the door and leaning against it.

You had done so well the past week, keeping Misha out of your mind. But one glimpse into his eyes, and you were gone. Turning to face the door, you hit your head against it a couple of times, frustrated beyond belief. 

"Y/N, is everything okay in there?" Jensen's voice came from the other side of the door, and you stepped back so he could open it. "I thought I heard something bang against the door."

You grabbed the lighter from the side cupboard. "Yeah, I just hit my foot. You know how clumsy I can be."

Nodding, he grabbed it out of your hand, and followed him to the backyard, where everyone had gathered to. Your backyard was your favorite place of your entire house. It had a generous lawn, with a swimming pool in front of it. To the side was a large, concrete patio, with a built in fire pit, along with different pieces of patio furniture, including the chaise lounger you would spend every day in if you could.

Across from the fire pit was Jensen's pride and joy, a state of the art BBQ. He had already brought the meat out, and was in the process of lighting it up. You walked over to the table, where Jared, Rob, and Rich sat, along with Gen. Opening the outdoor cooler, you made sure everyone had something to drink. "So Gen, Jared said you work on the show?" You asked, sitting down next to her, ignoring the pair of blue eyes that were currently staring into your back.

"Yeah, I just started a week ago. Everyone has been so nice. Especially Jared." She answered, and you couldn't completely hold back your chuckle. 

"Jared?" You teased, earning a glare from the man.

"Hey, I can be nice!" He argued, which had everyone at the table laughing.

Gen stared at Jared, a mischievous look in her eyes. "Is there something I should know about? Y/N, maybe you and I should have a talk." She teased, and right away you knew the two of you were going to become good friends.

After giving Jared a hard time, you went back over to Jensen, who looked very manly while manning the grill. "How's it going babe?" You asked him, wrapping your arms around him, and leaning your head against his shoulder. You didn't miss the way Misha's eyes darkened as he took in the cuddling. In a way you felt guilty, but Jensen was your husband after all.

"Not too bad. Meat should be done soon, if you want to bring the other food out." He told you. 

"Sure." You answered, turning to head back into the house.

"Hey Misha, can you help Y/N?" Jensen yelled, and you felt your body stiffen for a moment before you forced yourself to relax. You waited at the door for Misha, who jogged over to you.

He walked with you silently to the kitchen, but when you were away from people's prying eyes, he turned on you. "Y/N, I don't know what the hell to do." He told you, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"What do you mean?" You asked, nervously taking a step back, until your back hit the wall.

He sighed. "I keep telling myself you are off limits, that I can control myself around you. Then I see you, just a glimpse, and all my resolutions go to hell. And it's not like I can keep my distance from you. Jensen's my best friend, I will see you all the time!"

Running your hands through your hair, you answered him. "I know exactly what you mean. I had promised myself that I would forget my feelings about you, that I wasn't being fair to you, Jensen, or even me for that matter."

He stepped forward, raising his hand toward you, before dropping it. "So, what do we do?" He asked.

Without answering, you opened the fridge and started grabbing items from the fridge, giving yourself time to think. Misha seemed to understand that you needed a moment, because he stayed silent, grabbing items as you pulled them out. When everything was out and ready to go be taken outside, you turned to Misha. "I can't really think now. Not with all the people here, and Jensen right outside. Tomorrow's Sunday, and I know Jensen and Jared are going golfing. Why don't you drop by, and we can talk. With no outside interruptions."

He considered your suggestion, placing a finger against his lip as he thought. "Sounds good to me. When do they go?"

"They want an early tee time, so around 9. Why don't you come around 9:30. Then we can talk, and figure out where to go from here." You told him, as you grabbed the items. Not waiting for him to answer, you walked outside, placing the food on the table, just as Jensen announced that the rest of dinner was done. Misha had followed behind, silently placing the food on the table, before backing up and leaving you alone.

Soon everyone had their plates piled high, and were sitting around the table, enjoying the company and the food. You were sitting next to Gen, getting to know her, while Rob and Jensen talked about the upcoming convention's concert. Jensen had his arm casually wrapped around the back of your chair, rubbing his fingers up and down your shoulder, the touch intimate but unconscious at the same time. Leaning into it, you looked up to see Misha clenching his fist around his beer bottle. The look of desire and despair in his eyes had you reeling, and you self consciously licked your lip, watching as his eyes moved down, following the movement. Leaning over, you whispered into Jensen's ear, before grabbing a couple of the empty food containers, planning on taking them back to the kitchen. Misha shot up, grabbing some others, following behind you. Before you could even set them down, Misha was on you, backing you against the fridge, his hands on either side of your face.

"Do you know how hard it is to watch you, watch how Jensen is able to run his hands all over you, and know that will never be me." He told you, his forehead against yours, as frustration had him wound tight. "I thought I was just pining against something I couldn't have, but it's not just lust I feel. I know we were going to talk about this tomorrow, but Y/N, I needed to tell you. What I'm feeling? It's as if the sun was hiding until you came along. Now, my world is full of light, and colors, and I don't want to lose that feeling. I'm afraid that I'm falling in love with you." He told you, pressing a soft kiss to your lips, before backing up, and away from you.

Standing there shocked, you could only watch as he grabbed his coat and his keys. "I need to go. Please tell the others I'm sorry for rushing out. I will see you tomorrow." 

He left, and you stayed in the kitchen, your thoughts in turmoil. You weren't sure what you felt for Misha. You weren't sure your emotions were as strong as his, but what if they were? What would you do?


	9. Time For a Talk

That night you tossed and turned, anticipation and dread for tomorrow's talk making sleep difficult. "What's wrong?" Jensen finally asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" You asked, even though you already knew the answer. Jensen rolled over onto his side, brushing the hair back from your face.

"It's alright, but I would like to know what's going on. You've been on edge this entire week. Is everything okay?" He asked, as you leaned into the touch.

"I guess I was just stressed by the BBQ. I wanted everything to be perfect." You explained, skirting the real issue. 

"Honey, I don't want you worrying about things like that. My friends are your friends, and they will love you no matter what type of party you throw. But that doesn't explain your lack of sleep tonight." He replied, his hand resting on your waist. 

Sighing, you knew you had to give him some sort of answer. You hated this, the lying, but you knew it was necessary. "I don't know, maybe I had too much alcohol." You suggested, and he seemed to buy it. Rolling over onto his back, he pulled you with him, moving you until you were tight against his body, your head resting on his chest, his arm wrapped securely around you. 

"Listen, I know my life isn't the easiest for a relationship. I know I'm gone a lot, and you're left on your own. But please, if something is bugging you, please tell me. I can't fix anything if I don't know about it. I love you, and I can't imagine life without you, or seeing you unhappy." He told you, and you felt tears gather in your eyes at how bad a wife you were.

"You don't know how happy you make me." You told him truthfully, but as you laid there you tried to figure yourself out. If Jensen made you that happy, if you loved him as much as you thought, then why were you pining after Misha.

Jensen didn't answer, and you could feel the gentle rise and fall of his chest, letting you know he had fallen back asleep. Tracing light patterns on his chest, you tried to figure out what you were going to do in the morning. You loved your husband with everything you had, but you could also feel these hidden feelings for Misha, and you weren't sure where you wanted to take them. Tightening your hand in Jensen's shirt, you wished you had never been introduced to Misha, because then you wouldn't be having these issues.

It was about an hour later you were finally able to fall asleep, even though it was still restless and unsettled. It seemed like only moments later you felt Jensen stirring, and you groaned, cuddling closer into his chest.

You felt him run his hand along your back before he whispered words against the top of your head. "I know, I'm sorry sweetheart. But I promised Jared a day of golf." 

You nodded, feeling him slide out of the bed, but instead of waking up to see him off, you snuggled into his pillow, his familiar smell lulling you back to sleep. 

The next time you woke was to a pounding on the front door. Sitting straight up in bed, you wiped the drool from your mouth. Someone knocked again, and you slipped out of bed, brushing the hair back from your face. Grabbing your robe from the edge of the bed, you tied it on as you rushed down the hallway.

"Coming!" You yelled, sleep still fuzzing your brain. Throwing the door open, you could only stare at Misha in confusion.

"Misha?" You asked, stepping aside to let him in. The fog was slowly lifting, and suddenly you realized you had planned this little meeting with him. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I didn't sleep well last night, and must have forgotten all about it!" You apologized, leading the way into the kitchen. 

"Have a seat, want some coffee?" You asked, busying yourself around the kitchen, starting the coffee pot, grabbing an apple. You turned to check on him because he hadn't answered, only to see his eyes traveling your entire body. It was then you realized how you must look. Your hair was probably ratted due to your lack of sleep, and your face was probably wrinkled from the pillows. You were only dressed in one of Jensen's old t-shirts, a short robe covering it, leaving your legs bare from mid thigh.

"I'm sorry." You apologized again. "Let me go change. Give me five minutes." You told him, rounding the corner, intent on rushing towards your bedroom and changing. But Misha had other plans, he reached out, grabbing your wrist, stopping you.

"It's fine. Don't worry about it. You look good like this." He answered, his voice husky. Biting your lip, you turned back into the kitchen, Misha dropping his hand. Grabbing two cups, you poured the coffee, handing one to him, before standing across from him, sipping your own.

"So, rough night?" He asked, and you nodded. "Was it because of me?" You shrugged, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of the truth. 

"Misha, I still don't know what to do. I know you said you have feelings for me, but I just don't know if I can do this to Jensen. I love him too much." You told him, looking down so you didn't have to see the disappointment on his face. You knew this was the right thing to do, but why did it have to hurt so much?

You heard him get out of his chair, but you kept your eyes down cast, wondering if he was planning on just walking out. But then you felt his hands on your shoulders, gently turning you to face him. His callused fingers gently touched your chin, lifting it up until your e/c eyes met his blue ones.

"Y/N, you don't mean that. I know it's a hard decision, and neither of us want to hurt Jensen. But, what about us? Why do we have to hurt?" He asked you, gently cupping your cheek with his palm.

"Misha, I know this is hurting you. And if I wasn't with Jensen, I would jump at the chance to be with you. But I'm married to Jensen, and I love him, deeply. I can't do this to him." You said again, hoping Misha would leave it at that.

"Okay, I here you. One more kiss, and then we will forget this ever happened." He told you, his voice laced with sadness. You nodded, knowing one more kiss would make things harder, but you didn't want to hurt Misha anymore than necessary. Leaning forward, you felt Misha's hand move from your cheek to the back of your neck, tilting your head as his warm lips met your own. At first it was gentle, but then all the frustration and despair leaked from him into the kiss, and he pressed his lips hard to yours, so hard you could feel your teeth cutting into your lips.

Instead of complaining, you moaned, your arms raising on their own, crushing his shirt in your fists. You were so preoccupied with the kiss, you didn't hear the sound of keys in the door, or footsteps in the hallway.

"Y/N, are you up yet?" Jensen's voice echoed through the house, and before you could pull your lips from Misha's, Jensen rounded the corner, stopping at the sight in front of him.


	10. Don't Go

You backed away from Misha as fast as you could, your face beet red, as you saw the horror on Jensen's face. You couldn't believe it. Of course, with your luck, Jensen had to return early, just in time to see Misha kissing you. And you were still only dressed in your robe, your legs bare, your hair messy.

"Y/N?" He said, blinking his eyes as if this was just a bad dream. He stood at the doorway of the kitchen, his coat in his hand, a container of cinnamon rolls, your favorite, in the other.

"Jensen, please." You started, but he took a step back away from you, dropping the container, the hurt turning his eyes a darker shade of green, almost olive.

"So, that's what this has all been about. The restless nights, the strange behavior. I get it now." He said darkly, and you winced.

"Jensen, it's not what it seems." You tried telling him, but even you knew how cliched that sounded. But it was true, and you would do anything in the world to make him see that.

"You mean I didn't see you and Misha kissing?" He asked sarcastically, and finally Misha spoke up.

"Jensen, let's sit down so we can talk this out. If you need to be mad at anyone, be mad at me." Misha pleaded with Jensen, stepping beside you, but Jensen wasn't having any of it. He turned around and headed back to the garage.

Giving Misha a panicked look, you raced after Jensen, needing him to listen. "Jensen, please!" You yelled after him, but you could only watch as he grabbed his keys, opening the driver's door of his car. Standing next to his car, he frowned at you, his eyes full of tears. It was at that moment you hated yourself, that you could make Jensen hurt like this.

"You know what? I felt bad leaving you home alone after you've had a rough week. So I changed my plans with Jared, for you. But I guess you were glad to be left alone, weren't you?" He said, his hand on the door, a disapproving look on his face, one tear falling down his cheek.

"It's not like that! He came to talk, and I was telling him I loved you, that I wanted to be with you." You tried explaining, and he laughed at that.

"Well, you sure had a funny way of showing it. But don't worry, I'm leaving, so you and Misha can have all the private time you want." He told you before climbing into the car, and slamming the door. You stood there, tears pouring down your cheeks as you watched the love of your life driving away. 

Your face wet with tears, you stayed frozen to the spot, staring at the now empty spot where his car had been, unable to move, your heartbreak making you physically hurt. "Y/N?" You heard Misha softly say behind you, but you couldn't move. You didn't want to move, you didn't want to feel. You wanted nothing but the chance to make things right with Jensen.

You felt a gentle hand on your shoulder. "Y/N, come back inside. Please." He pleaded with you, but you shrugged his hand off.

"Leave me alone." You said, never once looking at him, your voice strangely calm and detached from your emotions.

"Listen, I will talk to Jensen, or talk to Jared, make him talk to Jensen. Let him know what was going on. Jensen loves you, he will forgive you. Please, come inside." Misha told you, but you were hurting too much to actually listen to his words.

"Please, just go." You told him again, wanting nothing more than to be left alone, to go and wallow in pity by yourself. 

He tried to turn you to face him, and that's when you snapped. "Misha, just go! Haven't you already ruined enough!" You yelled at him, not missing the hurt that crossed his face.

"Y/N, I know you're hurting, but I didn't think I was the only one in that kiss, or any of our kisses. And I know have a coworker that will probably try to kill me tomorrow. You're not the only one hurting." He tried to explain, but you weren't having any of it.

"I don't care. I just want to be alone." You said, the anger gone from your voice, and you shoved your way past Misha. "You can let yourself out." You told him, leaving him behind as you trudged up the stairs, making your way to your room. Once there, you slammed the door shut, before sliding down it, hugging your knees to your chest, letting the tears flow.

You knew it was your fault. You should have stopped Misha's attention from the very first moment. But you had been distracted by his beautiful blue eyes, outgoing personality, and the way he pursued you. And when you had tried to fix everything, it had made everything worse. And now Jensen probably hated you, and your marriage was now in shambles.

You weren't sure how long you stayed there, against the door, but when you finally decided to move, you moaned at how sore your muscles had become. Standing up, you threw your robe off, before climbing back into bed, wanting sleep to take away the pain. 

You laid on your usual side of the bed, pulling Jensen's pillow to your chest. Inhaling his scent, you calmed down a little bit, letting your heart beat slow down for the first time since Jensen had walked into the house. 

As you calmed down, you wondered if Misha was still here, or if he had followed your orders and left. But you didn't really care. The only person you wanted right now was probably cussing your very name. Closing your eyes, you tried to drift off to sleep, wanting the hurt to stop. Maybe, after a nap, things would look better, and maybe you could figure out a way to get Jensen to listen to you. But even though you told yourself that, you knew it wouldn't be easy, and that you had quite a fight ahead of you.


	11. Lifeless

The sun was setting when you woke up, your head throbbing, not feeling as refreshed as you would have hoped. As soon as your eyes opened, memories of what had happened just that morning drowning you in sorrow.

Moaning, you curled in on yourself, wondering how you were going to survive that night, and the following days. You wanted nothing more than to stay in your bed, and forget about the outside world, but in your heart you knew you needed to do something. You couldn't just sit by and hope everything worked itself out.

Reaching over, you grabbed your phone, noticing multiple text messages and calls. Your heart in your chest, you clicked on the first one, seeing Misha's name pop up. "Y/N, please let me know when you get this. I'm very sorry, and worried about you."

Clicking delete, you went onto the next one, wincing a little as you saw Jared's name. "Y/N, how could you? And with one of his best friends? You should see him. He's heart broken. He won't move from the couch, only to get a glass of whiskey. I am so disappointed."

You felt tears falling once again at that message, wondering how you even had any left to fall. The others were from friends who hadn't heard anything yet, your Mom wondering if you were coming down for your birthday. Normal, everyday tweets that showed you life moved on even when yours was crumbling all around you.

It was the last text that had your hands shaking, and you stared at the screen, unsure if you even wanted to open it. It was from Jensen, sent only an hour ago.

Taking a deep breath, you opened it, tears pouring down your cheek as you read the words. "Was I not enough for you? I don't understand why you would do something like that, and right now I don't even want to see your face. Maybe someday we can talk, but not right now. You're welcome to stay at the house, I'm planning on staying here with Jared."

You hit reply, but the words you wanted to say didn't seem snough. How could you tell him how sorry you were, that nothing had really happened. That when he walked in you were ending things before they became too heated? Finally, you tried. "Jensen, I'm not even sure you will read this. But if you do, please know I love you. I want to explain, because things looked worse than they really were. Let me know when you feel like talking. I know it will take time, but I will wait."

Pressing send, you decided to send one to Jared as well. You knew he was upset with you, but just maybe he would listen. "Jared, I know you probably hate me right now, but please, can we talk?"

The third text was to Misha. You knew he was hurting, maybe not as much as you, but he had still hurt his best friend, and the woman he claimed to love. "Misha, I hope you're doing alright. I know this has to be hard on you. Please don't worry about me. I will call you, Just give me a little bit of time."

After sending the text to Misha, you laid back down. You really wished you had someone to talk to, but you weren't sure who. You're friends back home were too busy raising their families, and you didn't want to burden them with your issues.

Sighing, you were trying to decide whether to wallow in bed all day or force yourself to get up and move when you heard the doorbell ring. Wondering who would be coming to visit you, you jumped out of bed, wrapping yourself in your robe. Taking a second to glance at yourself in your mirror, you winced at the sight in front of you. Your hair was a mess, full of tangles. Your face was red and blotchy, your eyes red and swollen.

Patting your hair down a little bit, you took your stairs two at a time, listening to whoever was at the door ring it multiple times. You wondered who it was, a little worried it was Jared coming to yell at you. "I'm coming!" You yelled, rounding the stairs, rushing into the foyer. Throwing open the door, you were surprised to see Gen there, her arms full of bags.

"I'm glad you opened it. I was worried you wouldn't." She said, shoving her way through the door, giving you no choice but to shut it and follow her into your kitchen. You watched as she unloaded her bags, which were full of cookies, ice cream and wine. "I wasn't sure exactly what you liked, so I brought a little bit of everything. Things that I like when I'm going through a rough patch." She explained.

"Not to sound rude, but what are you doing here?" You asked. You had only met her once, and while the two of you had hit it off well, you wouldn't have expected her here.

She stopped messing with the items, turning to look at you. She was dressed casually, in a pair of skinny, light blue jeans, a pale pink t-shirt and flip flops completing the ensemble. Her long, dark hair was braided, and she looked as if she was ready to sped a comfy day at the park, or working around her house. "I know we don't know each other well. But during your BBQ, I felt as if we could be good friends. And Jared told me that you and Jensen were having problems. I thought you could use a girl to talk to." She explained.

You gave her a smile, the first true smile you had felt like giving since early that morning. "Thank you. You don't know how much I appreciate this." You answered honestly.

"So, what will it be first? Chocolate, cookies? Ice Cream or wine? A little bit of everything?" She asked, and you smiled again.

"How about we start with some ice cream. I don't think wine would be a good start." You told her, moving to the cupboard to pull out a couple of bowls.

She nodded, and the two of you quickly got the ice cream dished out. "Where would you like to sit?" She asked.

You led her out to the patio, where both of you sat down in the patio chairs, slowly eating ice cream. "Listen, you don't even have to talk if you don't want to. Jared didn't give away any details. He had just canceled our plans tonight, saying he needed to be there for his friend. So I thought I could do the same to you. But please don't tell him, I don't want this to hurt our relationship." She said a little sheepishly.

"He's not talking to me anyways." You answered. "But it will be nice to have someone to talk to." You then proceeded to tell her everything. About the convention, your trip to the studios. You told her about the BBQ and how conflicted you had felt. You told her about Misha's visit, and how you had planned on ending things with Misha, and then how Jensen had walked in on the worst time possible.

"And I really don't know what to do. Misha's hurt, I'm hurt. Jensen won't talk to me yet, and I don't blame him. I hate myself for hurting Jensen, but I also hate myself for wondering what a relationship with Misha would be like." You admitted.


	12. Hard Love

"I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you're making life so much harder for yourself. You need to pick. Either you try to make things work with the man you married, or you try a relationship with Misha. But you can't have both." Gen told you, her voice firm but gentle.

"I know. And truthfully, I know in a heart beat who I would pick. But what if he doesn't want me back? What do I do then?" You asked her, getting up to grab some wine. She followed you inside, standing at the counter while you readied the wine glasses. 

After taking a big sip, you relaxed a little. "So, why don't we come up with a plan, to at least get him to talk to you. You have at least two things in your favor." Gen told you.

Setting your cup down, you stared at her, wondering where she was going with this. "You have me. I can talk to Jared, have him talk to Jensen. It might take some time, but I bet I can get him to see things my way."

"Okay. And what's the second part?" You asked.

"Jensen still loves you. I know he does. He's just hurting right now, but he loves you. We just need to focus on that." She told you.

The two of you continued to talk, throwing ideas around, making plans. You couldn't begin to tell her how grateful you were of her support. As you walked her to the door, you surprised her by squishing her in a huge hug. "Thank you so much for this. I needed this more than you could ever know."

She gave you a soft smile. "I hope that we can grow to be great friends. And friends are there for you with problems like this. Don't worry, we will figure things out." 

You nodded, your mood lightening considerably. Shutting the door behind her, you locked it before heading back to your room. Stepping into your large and luxurious bathroom, you stripped out of your clothes, deciding a nice warm shower would be the thing to end the evening with.

Turning the water on as hot as you could handle it, you stepped into the marble shower, moaning as the hot spray peppered your skin. The muscles in your back relaxing as the water pounded against them, you almost fell asleep standing up. 

After your eyes closed for the fifth time, you shut the water off, wrapping a thick light blue towel around you. Heading into your room, you changed into one of Jensen's shirts, needing to have the comfort of his signature smell around you. Even though you had slept most of the day away, you climbed into bed, exhausted from all the emotions running through you.

You thought about what tomorrow would bring. You weren't going to sit around, feeling sorry for yourself, waiting for everything to work itself out. You were going to work hard on getting Jensen back, even if it meant you had to beg and plead.

You had big plans for tomorrow, plans to show Jensen that you were sorry, that you would do anything in your power to make it up to him. Maybe he would see that you weren't kidding, and he would finally giving you a chance to explain.

Cuddling into his pillow, you let your eyes slowly drift shut. While you weren't happy by any means, you had a plan, and that relaxed you more so than anything else.

_________________________________________

Waking up the next morning, you stretched, reaching out to the side of the bed next to you. When it came up empty and cold, you sat straight up, remembering how you had messed up and how Jensen was now living over at Jared's.

Sighing dishearteningly, you reached for your phone, brightening up a little when you noticed a text message from Gen. "Listen, I talked to Jared today, before our first scene, told him to at least listen to you. He said he would. So text him sometime today. Fingers crossed."

 

You almost squealed at the news. If Jared was willing to listen to you, you were one step closer to Jensen listening to you. And hopefully, Misha was able to talk to them too, to get them to understand what had happened.

Feeling a little relieved, and light hearted, you sent a quick text to Jared. "I was wondering if we could get together soon, and talk. Please?" After clicking send, you hopped out of bed, changing into a pair of jeans, and a striped shirt. Making a pit stop in your bathroom, you applied a light amount of make up, wanting to hide the dark circles that were haunting you. Grabbing your phone, you bounded down the stairs, grabbing a banana before making your way to your car. Sliding into the driver's seat, you heard your phone beep with a notification. Picking it up, your heart skipped a beat when you noticed it was from Jared. "I will listen to what you have to say. Let's meet for lunch, I only work a half day today. One at our pizza joint?"

Not having as much time as you had planned on, you rushed around town, trying to find perfect ways to make Jensen see how sorry you truly were. You didn't want them to seem like guilt presents, but on the other hand, you wanted him to see that you wanted to make the marriage work. Your first stop was at your favorite cafe. You knew Jensen was working all day, and even though they have food trucks, you wanted to send him his favorite food for lunch. After being assured it would be delivered on time, you made your next stop. This one was to Jensen's favorite bakery. Picking out his favorite sweets, you stopped at the local paper store downtown, finding new stationary. Parking in front of Jared's house, you bit the tip of your pen as you considered what you were going to write. It was tricky, you didn't want it to sound too cheesy, but you also wanted him to understand. Knowing you were running out of time before you had to meet Jared, you gave it your best shot.

"Jensen my love, I know you might not want to hear that right now, but no matter what it is true, and will always be true. I did something stupid, and I know I don't have the right to ask for your forgiveness. But please, know this. It's killing me knowing you are hurting. And I never meant for things to go as far with Misha as they did. And I am willing to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I know I have no right to ask this, but please, when you feel up to it, can we please talk to each other? I don't care if it's through text, a call, or even through snail mail, I just need to hear your voice, or see what you are thinking. I love you."

Folding it over, you wrote his name on the top before taping it to the top of the baker's box. Placing it on the front step, you quickly drove away, wiping away a stray tear that had managed to fall.


	13. Not Planned

You felt a little foolish for leaving behind the sweets and the note on Jared's front door step, and you knew that he would be the one to find them, not Jensen. But you hoped that after talking to Jared, he would see reason, and not throw it away before giving it to Jensen.

This lunch meeting was important, one of the most important meetings you would ever have in your life. Of course you've had many important interviews and meetings before, but this one involved your heart. And you weren't sure you could handle it if Jared was cold and indifferent to you, even after explaining yourself.

You still hadn't moved your car from the curb in front of Jared's house. It sat idling as your mind wandered, an uneasy pit in your stomach as you dreaded what was ahead of you. You loved Jared, he was your friend, a close one. But he was Jensen's friend first, and they were as close as brothers, and you knew that he would take Jensen's side no matter what. You were afraid that no matter what you said to him, he wouldn't care. And because of that, you almost texted him to cancel the lunch. It would have been the coward's way out, but right now you weren't feeling very brave.

You even had your phone in your hand, ready to pull up his name, but a message from Gen changed your mind. "How is everything going this morning? I'm at set, and Jensen won't talk to anybody, so I can't tell how he is feeling. Misha was in his trailer earlier, but when he stepped out he didn't look too happy. I hope your lunch with Jared goes smoothly. We will talk later."

You couldn't believe how wonderful Gen was, how nice it was to have a friend like her. You texted her back quickly. "I've done a couple of things to hopefully help my cause. On my way to lunch with Jared right now. And thanks again for your help. You're amazing." As you clicked send, you received another text, this one from Jared. Hoping he wasn't canceling on you, you quickly opened it. "I have a table already. See you soon."

Glancing at the clock, you gasped at the time. Somehow you had been sitting in front of his house a lot longer than you had thought, and now you only had ten minutes to get halfway across town. Dropping your phone onto the seat next to you, you put the car in drive. You kept it slow through the neighborhood, knowing many of his neighbors knew your car and would complain to him if you sped. But as soon as you came to the main road, you romped on it, trying to make up some time. Luck was not with you that time, because it seemed like every light you came across turned red. Tapping your fingers impatiently on the steering wheel, you groaned at the third light you came to. Using the time, you flipped down your visor, checking your make-up. Your little cry fest as you had written the note hadn't done too much damage. Your eyes were red and puffy, but you didn't really want to change that. You wanted Jared to see how messed up you were about the whole thing. Flipping the visor up just as the light turned green, you romped on the gas pedal, knowing you were only about two minutes away from the cafe you were meeting Jared at.

What you didn't expect was the tall, powerful truck that decided to run through their own red light. As you sped halfway through the intersection, you glanced to your left, just in time to see the headlights of his truck heading straight your way. You could only brace yourself for the impact, knowing there was no way you could move out of his way. His headlights zoomed closer before colliding with the side of your jeep, crushing the half metal door. You cried out as the impact pushed your jeep to the side, pinning you between the mangled metal and the steering wheel. Your head snapped forward, colliding hard with the steering wheel, before being slammed backwards into the headrest by the airbag. The stone retaining wall stopped your jeep, and you were stuck between it and the truck. You dimly heard your horn going off, but didn't pay it much mind as your entire body screamed out in pain. As your eyes slowly started to close, you heard your phone ring from on the floor, but you couldn't move to pick it up.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry! Stay with me!" A stranger's voice yelled at you through the front window, but your eyes wouldn't open, and your last thought before you succumbed to the pain was of Jensen. And how he may never know how truly sorry you were, how you had wanted to fix things so badly.

__________________________________________

You couldn't move. That was the first thing you noticed as you slowly came back into consciousness. You felt as if your entire body was weighted down, your arms and your legs both disobeying your orders to move. Your head hurt, horribly, the beeping sounds from the room making it even worse. You wanted to groan, to cry, to do something to help release some of the pain you were feeling, but you weren't in control of your body. 

The only thing you could do was lay there, your eyes closed and listen. You could hear voices in the room with you, both familiar and comforting. But whatever they were talking about, it wasn't making them happy. You concentrated on listening it, ignoring the pounding as it increased in your head.

"Dude, what the hell happened?" Jensen's voice rang out, and while you were relieved to hear it, you were also surprised. You weren't sure you had expected him to be there, not after what had happened. 

"She was on her way to meet me. When she didn't show, I called her to see what was up. One of the cops answered the call, and let me know what happened. I called you as soon as a I heard." You heard Jared explain.

"How bad is it? Have they said?" Jensen asked, a shadow darkening your the bright lights that shown through your eyelids. 

You heard feet shuffling before Jared answered again. "I got here only minutes before you. The doctor hasn't been in yet, but from what the nurses said, it's not good. They were talking about prepping her for surgery."

"Damn it." Jensen muttered, and you could feel yourself become tired, wanting to sink back into the darkness that took away your pain. "What if she never wakes up? What if we never get the chance to make things better between us once again?" Was the last thing you heard.


	14. Waking Up

"Y/N, can you hear me?" A voice softly said from your left, and you struggled to open your eyes, wanting nothing more than to see the face that was attached to that wonderful, deep voice. "Please, baby, if you can hear me. Wake up. I need to see your gorgeous e/c eyes looking at me." It pleaded, and you could tell how sad and worried that person was.

You tried, you really did, but it was as if someone had taped your eyelids shut, because you couldn't even flutter them. Your arms and legs felt as if weights were strapped to them, holding them down, and your breathing was heavy and labored. Your head pounded, a deep, dull throb coming from your right temple. You wondered, trying to remember, what had happened to create this much pain in your body.

"I know we weren't talking. That I was mad at you. But none of that matters now. What matters is you waking up and getting better. The doctor said you were hurt pretty badly. And that it might take days for you to wake up, if you want to. He said it's all up to you. And I feel so stupid talking to you, when I know you can't even hear me. But I don't know what else to do. I can't lose you again, please baby girl." This voice pleaded, and while it sounded heavenly, you couldn't quite place who it was.

It was quickly joined by another voice. "Jensen, how are you holding up buddy?" Another voice said, this one not as deep, but a little smoother. 

"Jared, how do you think I'm holding up? What if she never wakes up? The last things I said to her were in anger. I can't live with myself if this is how it ends." He said, his voice breaking on a sob.

"She will wake up. Then the two of you can talk. Which really needs to happen. Have you talked to Gen, or Misha?" 

"Yeah, I talked to Misha the day of her accident. I was just going to call her, to ask to see her, when you called me." The one named Jensen answered, and your heart skipped a beat. Your head hurt so much, especially when you tried to pull up any memories. You couldn't remember either of these men, but it sounded like they meant a lot to you, especially this Jensen one. 

"Let's go get a cup of coffee. I'm exhausted." Jensen said, and you could hear a chair scoot back as he got up to leave. You didn't want him to leave, not yet. Struggling once again, you tried talking. Your throat was rough and sore, but still you tried to speak. One word came out, the sound garbled and forced, the word hardly intelligible. You weren't sure if they even heard it. A tear slipped down your cheek, the effort costing you so much.

"Y/N?" Jensen asked, coming back over. "Did she just talk?" He asked Jared.

"I don't know. It sounded like it." Jared replied.

You felt a warm pressure on your hand, calluses resting against your smooth skin, and you knew Jensen must have taken your hand. "Baby, please, if that was you, can you do it again."

You tried again, this time the words coming a little easier, but still sounding bad. "Wait, don't go."

"Y/N!" Jensen exclaimed, his grip tightening on yours. Your eyes started fluttering, and before you knew it, you were staring up into a pair of dazzling green eyes, full of worry, but also a little bit of relief.

"I'll go get the doctor." Jared said from the door, before leaving. 

Jensen took his free hand, cupping your cheek. "Y/N, I was so worried." He told you.

The touch felt comfortable, and familiar, but in your mind, you still couldn't quite place him. "Water?" You asked, hoping a drink of the cool liquid would help soothe your throat so you could talk a little easier.

He grabbed a cup from the side of the bed, tilting it so you could take a slight sip. It quenched your parched throat, and you almost moaned at how amazing it tasted.

"Better?" He asked you, and you nodded. Before he could ask anything else, you could hear steps, and your room soon had two other people in it. 

One was a pleasant looking woman, in her late thirties, a white coat covering a pair of pale blue scrubs. "Mrs. Ackles, it's so nice to see you awake. We were beginning to worry." 

You gave her a small smile. "It's nice being awake. But my entire body hurts." You croaked. 

She turned to look at Jared and Jensen. "Can you give us a moment please?"

They nodded, and left the room, gently closing the door behind them.

She began running the regular tests, checking your vision, your heart rate. Once she was done, she pulled a chair over to you. "Vitals look pretty decent for what you went through. I can tell you are still in some pretty hard pain, so when I'm done I will send a nurse in with some pain medication. It will make you sleepy, but at least you won't hurt as much."

You nodded, already worn out from your brief interaction with her and Jensen and Jared. "Now, do you have any idea how long you've been out since the accident?" She asked you.

You shook your head, your heart rate picking up as you tried to remember how you had gotten hurt. "I don't know. I don't remember anything. Not about my life before, or the accident, or even how those two guys were. It scares me." You admitted, tears falling as you realized you had no idea who you even were.

She placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, her gaze gentle as she looked at you. "I know it's a scary thought, not knowing who you are. But these things are common in head trauma patients, and you had a pretty nasty bump on your head. Give it time and your memories should return. And your husband seems more than willing to help you out."

You nodded, trying to calm down. She stood up, and opened the door, letting them back in. She held them back, talking to them in a quiet voice, so you couldn't hear. You could only watch as Jensen's face turned from worry, to shock, to sadness. He left Jared with the doctor, and strode over to you, taking your hand in his. "Is it true? You don't remember anything?"

You nodded, tears threatening to fall once again. "I don't even remember you. She said you were my husband?"

He sighed, running his free hand through his hair. "Yeah, I'm your husband. Don't worry, we will get through this together. She said it might not last long." 

You nodded, even though you were worried. What would happen if your memory never came back?"


	15. Visitors

After the horrifying and exhausting realization that you had no clue who you were, you had fallen back asleep, welcoming the darkness once again. You needed the empty thoughts, the lack of a pounding headache. Today had been too much for you, and you needed to decompress for a little bit, let your mind wrap around the fact that you had a life you couldn't even remember.

No matter how hard you tried, your sleep was restless, your thoughts plagued. A certain pair of forest green eyes kept popping up in your mind, and you knew they belonged to Jensen. You couldn't believe that a man as handsome as he would truly be your husband. You know it's what he said, along with the doctor, but you still had doubts that someone was pulling your leg.

After what seemed to be hours of troubled sleeping, you cracked your eyes open, squinting at the bright florescent lights above you. Sighing, you turned to your side, seeing spiky dirty blonde hair near your face. You could feel a warm, callused hand clasped tightly in your own, the warm breath as Jensen slept soundly next to you. He was sitting in one of the hospital chairs, bent over at the waist, his head resting next to yours, his arm stretched out so he could hold hands with you.

You hated to wake him, but you knew if he stayed like that much longer he would have a horrible kink in his neck and shoulders. Squeezing his hand, you listened to him moan as he slowly woke up. Tilting his head up, the pair of green eyes that had been haunting your dreams were now staring right at you, foggy with sleep still.

"Y/N?" He croaked, his voice deep and hoarse with sleep.

"Morning." You whispered, loving the way your hand felt in his.

You watched as the sleep slowly left him, his face become more alert, his body straightening, his groan confirming your suspicion of a sore and stiff neck. "How are you feeling?" He asked you.

You silently took stock of your body. Your arm hurt like crazy still, it hurt to breathe, but your head didn't throb as much. "A little better, I guess."

He nodded, seeming pleased with your answer. "Well the doctor says, depending on how today goes, you might be able to go home tomorrow."

You were surprised with the fact that you could go home. To a home you couldn't even remember. Frowning at that thought, you felt your mood considerably darken. "What is it?" Dean questioned you, not liking the look on your face.

You sighed, looking up at him with saddened eyes. "Home? I don't even remember what home is. You keep calling me Y/N and it's sad that it doesn't mean anything to me. You don't mean anything to me. I feel horrible for saying it, and I love when you were holding my hand. But I don't remember you, or what we had together. So what happens? I go home with you, and we pretend we are still in love, that I can remember our marriage?" You stated, hating the look of hurt and sadness that crossed his face.

Pulling your hand closer to his chest, he emphatically shakes his head. "I know it seems like the end of the world. You don't know who you are, or what we mean to each other. But we will figure things out. The doctor said this is temporary, that you should soon start to regain your memories. But this gives us a chance to kind of start again."

You raised an eyebrow at him. "Start again? Why?" You questioned, but before he could answer, the door opened, and a line of hospital workers came in, each one carrying vases full of various flowers. Some had balloons, some had stuffed animals.

"Where did all of those come from?" You asked, watching as they were placed on the window's ledge. Jensen made his way over to the first bouquet, a beautiful mixture of pink carnations and roses. Opening up the card, he read it, before going onto the next one. He read each card, his smile growing wide by the last one. Holding them all, he came over to you, handing them across. 

"They are from you're family, who misses you. There is also some from my coworkers, and that big one in the back? That's from a mixture of the Supernatural family. Looks like they all got together to get you a get well present." He told you, and you were extremely confused.

"The Supernatural family?" You repeated, wondering what that meant.

He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Oh shit, I forgot. I'm an actor, I've been on this show Supernatural, for quite a few years. We have a very amazing, and connected fan base." He explained, and you could only nod. You saw how handsome he was, it wasn't that big of a stretch that he would be an actor.

"Speaking of which, I'm going to need to leave. They need me on set, just for an hour or two. I have a scene I need to film with Jared, then I will be right back." He promised, grabbing his coat from the back of the chair.

"Jared's an actor too?" You asked, and he nodded.

"Yep. Now just relax, and I will be back before you know it." He told you, kissing you on the forehead before turning to leave. You loved the feel of his warm, smooth lips against your skin, and you wished he had pressed them against your lips instead.

"Jensen?" You said, just as he entered the doorway. He turned to look at you, his eyebrow raised in question.

"Thank you. For being patient with me." You thanked him, blushing at the huge smile he gave you.

"Of course. I love you. I almost lost you twice now, and I don't plan on losing you again." He told you, leaving after those words, and you could only stare at him, wondering what he meant by those words. You gathered one of the times was when you were in the accident, but what was the other time?

After Jensen had gone, you were extremely bored. You knew you should sleep. It would help you heal faster. But no matter how hard you tried, sleep wouldn't come. You turned the TV on, stopping when your husbands face popped up on the screen. The channel was showing a marathon of Supernatural episodes, and you left it on, the sight of Jensen's face comforting you.

Two episodes later, you heard a knock on the door, and your doctor stuck her head inside. "Good, you're awake. How are you feeling?" She asked, checking you over.

"Much better. My arm and chests hurt, but I feel a million times better than yesterday." You told her and she nodded.

"Good. Any memories returning yet?" She asked you, and you shook your head sadly. "Don't worry, it can take some time. But I am certain they will come back."

"Thanks Doc." You told her as she stood up to go. Glancing up at the TV, she smiled at what you had on. 

"You are a very lucky girl. Jensen seems like an amazing husband." She told you before leaving you alone once again.

As you sat there, wondering what else you could do to pass the time, you heard another knock on your door. "Come in." You yelled, tilting your head in confusion when an unfamiliar face popped their head into your room. Shaking your head at your own stupidity, you realized that every face was unfamiliar right now.

"Hello?" You asked, your eyes squinted as you waited for him to say something. He was tall, but nowhere near as tall as Jensen. He was well built, but still lean, wearing jeans and a faded sweater. His dark hair was messy as if he had been running in the wind all day. His eyes were a gorgeous shade of blue, a pair of eyes that were full of concern.

"Y/N?" He said. "I know you probably don't know who I am. My name's Misha, and I work with your husband Jensen."

You relaxed, glad that he had announced who he was, and how the two of you knew each other. You waited for him to say more, but he stood at the end of your bed, his hands in his pockets, his shoulders slumped, his eyes taking in every bruise and cut that he could see.

"I know I shouldn't be here. But I had to come see you for myself." He told you.

"What? Why shouldn't you be here?" You asked back quickly, wondering exactly what had been going on in your life before your accident.


	16. Confusion

The man who called himself Misha shifted his eyes to the door, as if he was ready to bolt, without answering your questions. You could see his inner struggle as he glanced at you, then the door, his hands clenching nervously. You didn't want him to leave, you wanted him to stay, so hopefully you could get some sort of answer. But in the same breath, you weren't sure you wanted that answer. Because of the way Jensen had skirted around it, and now this stranger Misha, you weren't sure you wanted to know.

Trying to pull yourself up so you could see him more clearly, you groaned as your broken arm gave way underneath you, letting you collapse back into bed. The sudden movement jarred your ribs, and you could only lay there, breathing shallowly, waiting for the pain to subside.

"Y/N, are you okay?" Misha asked, rushing towards your side, grabbing your shoulders gently and helping you scoot up until you were a little more comfortable. He stayed by your side, scooting the chair over until he could sit in it but still be in your line of sight.

"I will be. I hate this." You mumbled, frustrated that you couldn't even prop yourself up.

He sighed. "You were just in a car wreck. It's going to take time to heal."

You tried shrugging your shoulders, but the movement had you gasping in pain. "I know, but still." You grumped. But at least he had stayed. "Misha?" You asked him.

"Yeah?" He asked, as his hand slowly inched closer to yours. "What did you mean when you said you shouldn't be here? You just work with my husband, right?"

He dipped his head, avoiding your gaze, giving you the answer that there was more than meets the eye going on. "I probably shouldn't say anything. You and Jensen need to talk first." He tried explaining, but you were done with being tiptoed around, and you wanted answers. If your memories weren't coming back yet, the least you could have were answers. "Please. I hate this, not knowing anything. And the way you're acting, we were more than friends, weren't we?"

"Well I..." He started saying, before he stopped, and stood up, pacing the small floor. "I can't. I already ruined things between you and Jensen once. And now it seems like you have a second chance. I can't ruin it again. I care about the both of you too much." He said, his voice deep with emotion.

"So what? You want to wait, to see if I get my memories back? Then, if I don't, we pretend that whatever it was, it never happened?" You asked, frustration lacing your words.

"Fine, but this is going to come back to haunt me. And I had already started to make things better with Jensen." He growled. "You were happily married to Jensen, when we first met at a convention. I fell for you immediately, the way you stood there, so sweet and beautiful. I didn't know at first you were Jensen's wife, I hadn't had the chance to meet you yet. We talked, and you were so smart, and kind, and I lost my heart to you."

You gasped. You had known it was something like this, but you hadn't quite expected him to declare his love for you this quickly.

He continued. "Then I found out you were already taken. I tried to stay back, but every time I saw you, it was as if there was this magnetic force between us, and I couldn't seem to help myself. I was drawn to you, and I did things I was not proud of. After each touch, each kiss, I would go home, and kick myself for feelings this way, for pushing things. I knew it was going to hurt my relationship with Jensen, but I couldn't seem to control myself."

"Then what? Something big must have happened for you and Jensen to act this way. Did I choose you?" You whispered, not sure you wanted to hear the answer.

He sat down then, his head hanging in his hands, and you couldn't make out his words. You softly asked him to repeat his words. "Something big did happen. We met one morning, while Jensen was with Jared. I told you how I was feeling, gave you a choice. You chose Jensen. I knew you would, and I don't blame you for it. But every night I go to bed, wishing you had chosen me." He said, his voice thick with emotion, his eyes when he gazed up at you shimmering with unshed tears.

You were frozen, unable to speak, or move. It was exactly what you hadn't wanted to hear. You hated the fact that the previous you, the one you can't remember, seemed to have toyed with these men's emotions, and might have ruined your relationship with both.

"Can you tell me what happened next?" You asked him.

"Sure. Jensen came home, just as I gave you a goodbye kiss. He saw it, assuming the worst. The two of you got in a fight, and he left. You've been apart ever since, and he hasn't talked to me. Until the day of your accident I cornered him in his trailer, not letting him go until he heard the truth." He admitted.

You could only sit there, letting all of this new information sink in, wondering what you were going to do with it. You knew for a fact you couldn't look at Jensen the same way now.

Misha stood, his hands in his pockets, his shoulders slumped. "Listen, I shouldn't have come, and I'm sorry I even told you all of this. Please know, I still love you, but I promise I won't come between you and Jensen again. I value our friendship too much. But maybe, one day, you and I can become friends."

"I would like that." You told him, giving him a soft smile as he left the room. As soon as he was gone you leaned back, exhausted from all the emotions running through you. Sleep came immediately, and you welcomed it, not ready to contemplate all you had just learned.

________________________________________

The next time you woke the room was dim. The lights were off, and the shades were open, showing the sun slowly setting. You could just barely make out a figure in the seat next to your bed. His long, lean body was slumped down, his head resting in his hand as he watched you. You should have considered it creepy, but you felt comforted by the fact that Jensen cared enough about you that he would sit in a darkened room making sure you were okay.

"Hi." You whispered, your voice already going thick with emotion at the thought of what you had put this man through. You might not remember him, or remembered why you loved him, but from his care and concern now, you were already falling in love with the man once again.

"You're awake!" He exclaimed, sitting forward, taking your hand in his own. "How are you feeling?"

"A lot better. I can't wait to get out of here." You admitted, giving him a bright smile to punctuate your words.

"Good. How was your day? Hopefully much better than mine. I had to spend it next to Jared, and he was super gassy today." Jensen told you, standing up to turn the lights on.

"Leave them off. Please." You pleaded, not wanting to see his face when you talked to him. Not yet.

"Okay." He answered, a little puzzled, but willing to grant your request.

You took a deep breath, knowing you wanted to get this over with.

"Jensen, I had a visitor today." You started.

"Well, that's good. Isn't it?" He replied quickly, not seeing what the problem was.

"Usually. But this visitor. He told me some news, told me what I did before my accident. And how can you even be sitting in the same room with me after what I did to you. Why don't you hate me?" You sobbed, your emotions taking over your words.


	17. Confrontation

"Damn it." Jensen muttered, standing up and pacing the room. When he came back, he was rubbing his hand across his mouth, his frustration evident. "Was it Misha?"

You nodded, tears still falling down your cheek. You were furious at your previous self, that you had hurt this man. "Yeah, and what he told me. I'm so sorry."

He sighed, before sitting down next to you. "What did he tell you?" 

So you told him everything, all of Misha's side of the story. He sat there listening the entire time, never reaching for your hand, his eyes dark and hooded, his emotions hidden, and you wondered if you had just lost him, for what would be the second time. You found yourself hiccuping through the entire story, overwrought with emotions, and the fear of losing a man you were just beginning to know again. 

"Say something." You pleaded after you were done talking. You couldn't handle his stony silence anymore, you wanted him to speak so you wouldn't have to wait for the pain. You wanted it to get over with so, because the waiting was just as bad.

"What can I say? That's his side of the story. One he's told you, and he's told me. So either he's really good at lying to keep you safe, or he's telling the truth. But we won't really know until you get your memory back." Jensen argued, and you could only agree with him.

"True, but I'm not telling you to forgive me. From what Misha said, I don't deserve your forgiveness. I would love to have it, because I can already feel myself falling for you, again. But I won't force that on you." You told him. "And I don't know exactly what I was thinking, how I was feeling. I don't know if I really felt something for Misha or not."

Placing his head in his hands, he hung it down low. "I really don't want to hear this. I came here, hoping that I could talk to the woman I love without this whole thing with Misha hanging over us. But the Ass had to come in, didn't he."

You sighed, hoping what you were going to say wouldn't upset him even further. "Don't be mad at him. He really hesitated about talking about it. I forced him. He didn't want to upset his relationship with you any more than it already is." 

 

"Yeah, did you get out of bed and twist his arm? He didn't have to say anything." Jensen said quickly.

"No, but he wasn't going to say anything so I moved, trying to reach out to him. When he noticed how much pain I was in, he gave in." You told him, and Jensen's head shot up, searching your face. 

"Are you still in pain? Should I get the doctor?" He asked, jumping to his feet. You reached out, wincing as the movement hurt your ribs.

"Sit down, please. It's nothing too bad. I had just tried to put weight on my broken arm, which hurt my ribs when I fell down." You told him.

He sat back down, but didn't seem convinced. "I'm so sorry." You whispered, not knowing what else to say.

Just then the doctor came into your room, and you were grateful for the interruption. "And how's my favorite patient?" She asked you, as Jensen scooted back to give her room.

"A little sore, but much better." You admitted as she checked you over. 

"Well, that's to be expected. But the good news is you have healed enough that I think you can go home tomorrow. As long as someone is there most of the day to help you out." She said, glancing at Jensen who stood there with a stony expression on his face.

"Mr. Ackles, would you be willing to take care of your wife?" She asked, glancing between the two of you, noticing something was off.

He stayed silent for a moment longer, and you wanted to hide under your blanket in shame. "Yeah, I can do that. But I'm also filming during the day, so what then?" He asked, and you let out a breath of relief.

The Doctor hummed as she thought. "Well, as long as she has food, water and pain pills next to her, and her only trips are short to the bathroom. I think she would be okay. As long as she has someone she can contact if things go wrong."

Jensen nodded his head, but you were still troubled by something. "When will my memory return? I would have thought it would have by now."

"The brain is a tricky thing. Jensen said life had been a little stressful before the accident, and now you're busy healing. It might take longer than most, but you should start remembering things soon." She said before turning to leave.

As soon as she left, Jensen headed towards the door, surprising you. "Jensen?" You questioned softly.

He turned, sighing. "I need some fresh air. I need to think about things. But know this. I really do want to try to make things work. But I think in order to do that, we need to wait for your memory to return. Because right now, there is this big gap, and there is no getting past that."

You nodded, grateful that he was still willing to work things out. He gave you a sad smile before leaving the room.

You weren't alone for even five minutes when a petite, dark haired woman came rushing through the doors. "Y/N!" She exclaimed, her face full of life and kindness, and you couldn't help but smile at her.

"And you are?" You asked, stopping her in her tracks. Her smile fled for a moment before it returned, just as bright as before.

"Oh shit. Sorry, I forgot. You mean you haven't remembered anything yet?" She asked, coming to sit next to you.

"Nope. Nothing." You answered her.

"Well, I'm Gen. I work with your husband and his friend. And I'm also currently dating Jared. And I would like to think of us as friends. Now dish. I want to know everything that's happened." She said.

You followed her orders, telling her everything. About how kind Jensen has been, how Misha had come in and reminded you of what happened. You even told her about your conversation with Jensen. She sat there quietly, listening and nodding her head along.

"That Misha. He's a sweetheart, and he means well, but he has really dug himself a grave." She told you.

"True, but what if my memory never returns? Because I think without it, my relationship with Jensen will never be the same." You admitted your fears to her.

She shrugged. "I have faith that you and Jensen will work things out. And give it time. I know your memories will come back, and as soon as you can go home, I will come hang out, and help you jog them. Deal?"

You nodded, amazed at how great of a friend she was. "Deal. And I get to go home tomorrow!" You told her and she squealed. 

"That's perfect! I don't need to be on set for the next two days, so I will come over and help you out. You will have your memory back in no time!" She told you, and you were slowly catching on to her enthusiasm.

She glanced down at her watch, a slight frown marring her face. "I'm sorry to do this. But I promised Jared we would do dinner tonight. Let me know when you get home tomorrow, and I will come over. With real food. I'm sorry you had to deal with this." She said, pointing towards the half of a sandwich and jello laying next to you.

She left, and you were once again alone, but this time you didn't mind. Trying to get comfortable, you felt confident that starting tomorrow, your life would slowly get back on track.


	18. Going Home

You tossed and turned as you saw glimpses of things, things that seemed like deja vu. You were dressed in a beautiful white dress, sleeveless satin, covered in a fine film of lace. Your hair was hanging down in soft waves, and you were currently walking down an aisle of a church, Jensen waiting for you up front. You could feel your heart pounding as you moved forward, but the Sunlight filtering through the giant hospital windows, and you tried to turn away from it, groaning as it woke you from your strange dreams.

Staring up at the white ceiling and florescent lights, you wondered if it was a dream, or if you were truly getting your memories back. If that was so, you had just remembered your wedding with Jensen, and the thought of it brought tears to your eyes at how wonderful it had been. From what you could remember, it seemed like the perfect wedding, exactly what you had hoped for.

Wondering if this was the way the rest of your memories would come back, slowly, while sleeping, you sighed. If so this was going to be a long, and drawn out process. One which you weren't sure you would have the patience for. Your patience was already growing thin, you were done being stuck in the middle of these four white walls, with only erratic visitors and a TV for company. You were ready to go home, to sleep in your own bed, to feel the warmth of the sun on your face. You were already growing grumpy, and you were afraid that if you didn't get to leave here soon, someone would be getting yelled at.

While you were being grumpy over the fact of being stuck inside the room, there was a slight knock on the door, before your Doctor showed her herself. "Good morning! I'm glad to see you're awake!" She said, extremely peppy for the morning.

She came right over, checking to make sure nothing had changed during the night. "Well, everything looks great. I'm thinking you can head home today." She told you, and your mood brightened considerably. 

"That's great!" You answered her. "And I think my memory is starting to come back." You told her.

"That's good to hear. Can you tell me how it happened? Was it all at once or?" She asked you, writing something down on her clipboard.

"It started while I was sleeping. I remembered my wedding day." You explained, and she nodded, before grabbing a chair and pulling it close to the side of your bed. 

"Wonderful news. But now I want to talk about something you might not like." She started, and you could only stare at her in confusion.

"I'm not sure who will be transporting you from the hospital today. I was wondering if your husband would, but his visits have been a little sporadic lately, and frankly, I'm worried about sending you home. I sense something is going on between the two of you, and I don't want it to get in the way of your healing."

You sighed, knowing she wasn't trying to be rude, or invasive. She just had your best interests at heart. But still it hurt, knowing that a Doctor could see the discord between the two of you. "There is something. Before my wreck, I made a couple of stupid mistakes, and hurt him. Pretty bad. Actually, I was working on fixing them, trying to make everything better when I got into the accident. I was going to meet with his friend, explain things, when that truck came out of nowhere. But Jensen, last time he was here, promised that we would try to work things out." You said, but then a light bulb popped in your head. "Oh my god, I just remembered something else!" You exclaimed.

She smiled at you, laying a comforting hand on your forearm. "I can see that he loves you, deeply. Give it time, and things will work out. But please, during that time, make sure you have someone else you can contact for help."

She stood up to leave, turning back to face you one more time. "I'm going to sign your discharge papers. As soon as Jensen, or a friend arrives, you will be free to go."

As soon as she left, you considered your options. You didn't have your cell phone with you, it had gotten broken in the wreck. You couldn't remember a lot of numbers, so you couldn't call Gen to come pick you up. You could call Jensen, but you weren't sure he would want to here from you yet.

Nibbling on your bottom lip as you contemplated what to do, your door opened, and Gen and Jared both walked in. "Hi guys!" You exclaimed, excited and relieved to see them.

"Hi yourself." Gen said, coming to stand next to you. "We just saw your Doctor, and she gave us your news. You ready to head home?" 

You nodded, wishing you could jump out of bed and run down the hallway, squealing with joy at your freedom. But your body was still a little too bruised for that. "Yes, thank god. Not that I'm not happy to see the two of you, but where's Jensen?" You asked carefully.

Jared had come to stand by Gen, and you could see how easily the two of them were falling in love. He had casually placed his hand on her waist, and she had leaned into him, even though they were both concentrating on you. "They needed Jensen at the studio this morning. He couldn't get out of it." Jared apologized for his friend.

You slightly nodded your head, sad that Jensen wasn't there, hoping what they were saying was true and he wasn't trying to avoid you. Meeting Jared's eyes, you didn't see any discomfort from lying there, so you took the chance and believed him.

A nurse came in, wheeling a wheelchair. "Well, Mrs. Ackles, are we ready to get out of here?" She asked you, and you nodded enthusiastically. "Let's get you dressed so you can blow this joint." She teased, and Jared and Gen stepped back. The nurse helped you slide off the bed, holding most of your weight as you became accustomed to standing upright. She then slowly moved you into the bathroom.

What usually only took minutes to get dressed, seemed to take hours. You were frustrated at how weak you were, and how much help you need in doing simple things like pulling your shirt over your head. But finally, you were dressed in normal clothes, sitting in the wheelchair as the nurse pushed it down the sterile hallway making her way to the double doors in front. You stared, transfixed, waiting for the moment you could breathe in the fresh air.

"I can wait to get home, and lay outside on my lounger, all day. Maybe have a glass of iced tea next to me. Sounds perfect." You said to Gen who walked beside you, causing her to stop. "What?" You asked.

"You remembered your lounger! That's a good thing, right?" She said, smiling down at you.

"I forgot to tell you, it's not the first thing I've remembered today. I remembered my wedding, and the wreck." You explained.

By this time, you were outside, and you took a deep breath of the air, letting the sun shine down on your face. It felt wonderful. Jared had already called ahead, and his shared bodyguard, Cliff, was pulling the Suburban around to the entrance. He stepped out, giving you glance, before opening the door. "Hi Cliff!" You said, surprised at how easy his name, and who he was, came to you.

"Good morning Y/N." He said stiffly, and you figured out that he was still a little sore at you. Pushing against the armrests, you attempted to stand up, your knees shaking at the effort. Jared noticed, and he came to the rescue, bending down and wrapping his arms around you. Gently carrying you, you slid you into the front seat, leaning over to buckle you in. 

"Thank you Jared." You told him, grabbing his hand to show him you meant it. "Not just for this. But for everything. I know it's hard, but thank you for being here for me."

He gave you a smile, patting your leg, before shutting the door. They climbed in the backseat, and soon you were off. You were busy staring out the window, waiting for things to look familiar. At first you grew frustrated, when the route and buildings seemed strange and foreign. But then Cliff turned onto another street, one shaded with huge trees on each side, and you gasped.

"What? Are you okay?" Gen asked, leaning forward, frowning at you. You were currently bouncing in your seat, excited.

"I remember this road!" You exclaimed. "I think I remember how to get home!"

Cliff stayed silent, but a small smile graced his lips at your exclamation. You were able to point which way to turn, and he was nice enough not to say anything, but to silently follow your directions. "Here we are!" You pretty much yelled, as he stopped right in front of a gated, two story house. You wanted to get up and run to the house, you had missed being home so much. But Cliff had his window down, and he pressed in the key code and the gate opened, driving up the short driveway, before parking in front of the wooden front door. 

Jared bounced out of the backseat, coming to open your door. But before he could wrap his arms around you, to carry you in, you saw a strong, familiar hand squeeze his shoulder. "I've got her. Thanks buddy." Jensen said, his green eyes smiling down on you as Jared stepped out of the way."


	19. Home Again

You were surprised to see Jensen, so surprised in fact that your arms remained wrapped around Jared's neck instead of moving over to Jensen as he reached in to grab you. It made for a really awkward moment, with both men cramped in the small area, Jensen's arms around you with your arms around Jared.

 

"Y/N, sweetheart, you can let go now." Jensen said softly next your ear, and blushing you complied. He picked you up, seemingly effortless as he stepped away from the car and moved towards the house. Cliff bounded ahead of him, opening the door, and you could hear Jared and Gen behind you. Jensen kept on moving through the house, and you gasped as you saw the yard outside. "Oh, I missed my patio so much!! I can't wait to lounge all day under the sun!" You exclaimed, and Jensen's grip tightened on you, but he didn't say anything.

He kept on moving, up the stairs, and you knew it would be the farthest door on the right that he would open. You were correct, and you were instantly comforted by the fact that you remembered this room, and that it felt like home to you. Jensen leaned over and gently placed you on the bed, before standing up. You stared up at him, amazed that he didn't even seem winded. 

Jared and Gen were right after him, while Cliff must have stayed downstairs. "Thanks for your help guys." Jensen told them, as Gen came up to you. 

Leaning over, she gave you a tight hug, before whispering into your ear. "Wasn't this the best surprise?" You nodded, and she stepped back. "Don't worry, I will be back soon." She promised, and after Jared gave you a little wave, they were off.

After they had gone, you fidgeted with the edge of the blanket, feeling awkward. You weren't sure what to do, or say, and you wanted to wait for Jensen to make the first move. You felt the bed dip on the far side, and you glanced up to see Jensen lounging on the bed next to you. "Well, I hope this is an okay surprise. I wanted to be the one to bring you home from the hospital, but they decided it would be better this way."

"It's alright. It was a nice surprise." You answered shyly. 

"What you said earlier, about our patio. Does that mean you are remembering things?" He asked you, lounging on his side so he could gaze at you. It was your first good look at him. He hadn't shaved that morning, and he had stubble covering his chin. He was dressed in a light gray t-shirt, and a pair of lounge pants, his go to Sunday lazy day outfit, you suddenly remembered.

You nodded, seeing a huge smile cross his face. "That's great! We need to celebrate! What can you remember? Everything? Or just bits and pieces?"

"Just bits and pieces right now. But they are coming back very fast. I remembered our wedding." You told him, still feeling shy for some reason.

He reached over, brushing his knuckles against your cheek. "I'm glad. That was a very special day. It would have been horrible if it had remained gone."

"Why are you being so nice to me?" You whispered, not wanting to ruin his good mood, but needing to know why. It was keeping you off kilter, and you needed to know where you stood, or laid as it seemed to be.

"Because, I've had a lot of time to think. And I've listened to Misha's story. And I want to make this work between us. To give you the benefit of the doubt. Until at least all of your memories have returned." He told you, his hand moving away from your check, traveling softly down your arm until it grasped your arm.

"I would like that a lot. I still haven't remembered a lot. Mainly our wedding, the wreck, and the route here. I can't wait until I remember more, like how we met, and when I first fell for you." You answered.

"Well, how about we take it easy today. We can lounge in bed, watching anything you want, gouging ourselves on junk food. How does that sound." He said, rolling to stand out of bed, and you caught yourself staring at the slight strip of skin bared by the movement.

"Sure, whatever you want." You muttered, still a little flustered over your reaction to the sighting of bare skin.

He came over to your side of the bed, leaning down and pressing a soft, chaste kiss to your cheek. "No, it's not what I want. You've been through a lot lately, and I want this to be all about you." He told you, his green eyes sparkling in the sunlight shining through the far window.

"I still don't get why you are being so nice to me. I made some mistakes, mistakes that hurt you. And you being nice makes me feel even worse." You admitted.

He sighed, sitting down next you, his hand still brushing lightly up and down your arm. His eyes watched his movements, as he stayed silent for a moment. "You're right. Your mistakes did hurt me. A lot. But it wasn't just you. It was Misha too. And from what he said, you were trying to do the right thing. He said you had chosen me. So, now matter how much I might still be hurt over the fact that you had an infatuation with Misha, you're my wife. I promised to stand by your side. No matter what. I love you, and I really want to make this work."

You felt tears gather in your eyes as his words soaked into your skin, soothing a heart you hadn't realized had been hurting that bad. The first tear fell as he looked up at you, his eyes flooded with unshed tears. "Jensen, my memories might be slow in returning, but I know that even in this short amount of time I've started fallen in love with you again. And I know, no matter what happened, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you." 

"One step at a time." He told you, standing up. "And the first step. What should we munch on first?" He asked you, bringing a smile to your face.


	20. Slow

Leaning back against the pillows, you sighed contentedly, amazed at how well the day had gone. Jensen had been amazing, making sure you had everything you needed, staying next to you all the time. He had made the two of you a wonderful nest on your king sized bed, the nightstand next to him full of different snacks and treats. The TV in front of you had been playing movies all day, your favorites.

At first you had been hesitant, staying on your side of the bed, still feeling a little overwhelmed by his forgiveness. But as the day passed you relaxed, and you felt your sore body slowly shifting his way.

During the last movie, after your bowl of popcorn lay forgotten by your feet, your head had somehow made its way to his chest his arm wrapped around you. His fingers were currently running softly through your hair, and you felt your eyes start to drift shut, even though you worked hard to keep them open.

Knowing you weren't going to last much longer, you snuggled closer to Jensen, breathing in the comforting scent that was uniquely him. "Thank you." You whispered against his chest, yawning as soon as the words left your mouth.

His hand stilled for a moment, before he continued his movements. "For what?"

"For this. And for being there for me. I didn't deserve it, but you still came through." You told him, refusing to open your eyes.

"Anything for you. We will work this out." You heard him whisper against your head, his lips touching your forehead before you fell asleep.

\--------------------------

You felt a hand grasping yours, and you looked down to see a hand that didn't have a wedding ring, or the usual bumps and calluses that you had come to know from Jensen's hand. Following the hand up the blue long sleeved shirt, your gaze landed on a pair of familiar blue eyes. "Misha?" You questioned, wondering what he was doing here, in your house.

"Shh, everyone's outside." He warned you, and you took a second to glance around in confusion. You were standing in your kitchen, with loud voices coming from outside. The counter was full of empty plates and containers. It was then you remembered, you were having a BBQ, getting to know some of Jensen's friends better.

"What are we doing?" You asked him, as he took a step closer to you, trapping you against the fridge. You seemed nervous, but a little excited at the same time.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I know I wanted a little time together. Without the prying eyes of your husband." He whispered, his mouth inches away from yours.

You felt your heart beating rapidly, wanting him to kiss you, wanting to push him away. It was so confusing, you wanted to scream. He took the decision away from you, pressing his chapped lips to yours, pressing his hands to the fridge, trapping you against it and his hard body. You stayed still at first, frozen in the moment, but his lips changed angles, and you felt yourself moaning. Getting caught up in the kiss, you raised your hands, threading them through his hair.

Sitting straight up in bed, you could feel your heart clambering in your chest. While other memories had floated into your mind, this one had come in like a train, wrecking the calm state you had been in. Feeling uneasy, you stole a glance to the other side of the bed, relieved to see Jensen still sound asleep.

Not wanting to disrupt him, you carefully slid out of bed, grabbing your robe before exiting the room. You needed space, and time to think. Time to take in all the new information that was currently bouncing around your head like a ping pong ball.

Your body was weak, still recuperating from the wreck, and there were multiple times you had to stop, placing your hand on the wall to hold yourself up, your knees shaking like jello. By the time you had finally made it down the stairs, you were out of breath, your brow covered in a fine sheen of sweat. You looked back at them, knowing there was no way you were going to be able to climb them tonight. 

Your first stop was the kitchen. While you really wanted something like whiskey to fortify yourself with, you grabbed a glass of water instead. You knew alcohol wouldn't mix with your pain meds. Carefully feeling your way down the darkened hallway, you made your way into the living room before collapsing onto the couch. Pulling the throw from the back of the couch over you, you relaxed there sipping your drink.

Minutes ticked by, and you blankly stared at the patio doors, watching as the moon hid behind the silvery clouds. You thought back to the memories that had bombarded you. You had always had a feeling that something had really happened between you and Misha, you just hadn't known to what extent.

In a small way you had been hoping that it had all been one sided, that Misha had been the one doing the pursuing, and you had pushed him away at every turn. But these memories that had returned showed you that wasn't true. That you had felt something for Misha, and you still might. You weren't sure what happened after that kiss, only that you had promised to talk to him later. Softly pressing your fingers to your lips, you relieved the kiss, wondering how you could ever go back to a normal life with Jensen. If he even knew that you had kissed Misha. 

You were so caught up in your thoughts that you didn't hear the footsteps thundering down the stairs. It wasn't until you felt the couch dip down beside you that you were able to slip out of your tranced like state.

"Y/N! When I woke up and you weren't there, it freaked me out!" Jensen explained, his voice loud with worry. "What are you doing out of bed?"

"I just needed space. Time to think." You said, never taking your gaze from the doors, even when you felt his hand on yours.

"What is it?" He asked you, noticing the change in your demeanor. "Did you remember something else?" 

You stayed silent, just for a moment, but it was enough that you felt his hand clench tightly around yours. "Yes, I remember a little bit more now. I remember the night of our BBQ." 

"And?" He asked, but his voice was hesitant, like he wasn't sure he wanted to hear the answer.

"I remember how much fun we were having. How great all your friends were. But then, I remembered Misha. And how he followed me into the kitchen." You told him, finally turning to face him. His face was bathed in the moonlight, and you could see how stiff his body was. He was preparing himself for the worst, and you didn't blame him. "I remembered him kissing me."

You heard his intake of breath. "Yeah, he told me about that night." Was all he said.

"I'm so sorry." You whispered, wondering where this would take your relationship.

"I'm glad you remember. Because do you know what else he told me?" He said, his grip still tight on yours. "He told me how you both talked that night. How you had pushed him away at first, and then, after the kiss you told him you needed to talk to him."

"I don't remember what happened next." You explained. "I don't know if I was planning on pushing him away and staying with you. Or if I was wanting to see how things went with him. I don't remember any of it, and it's killing me!"

Taking his hands, he cupped both sides of your face, making sure your focus was on him. "I could tell you. It would be so much easier on both of us if I told you what he told me. But I don't think the easy way is going to work for us. We need to wait, to be patient. Until you remember everything, we just need to take this one day at a time."

You nodded, feeling a tear slip down your cheek. "How can you be so calm about this?" You asked him.

"I've had plenty of time to think. And during that time I've decided that I want to fight for you, to show you that our relationship is something special. So for now, I'm here for you, however you need me. Until you can remember everything, and make a decision for yourself."

You leaned forward, surprising him by pressing your lips softly against his. "Come on, let's get back to bed." He said, standing up after you had moved back.

You glanced back towards the stairs, a look of utter defeat on your face. "I might just sleep down here tonight." You muttered, not missing the hurt look that crossed his face. "No, it's not what you think!" You quickly explained. "I just can't think about managing those stairs again."

He smiled, before quickly swooping down and picking you up in his arms. "You don't have to. You have your own personal escalator." He teased, carrying you up them quickly, and you laughed, the tense moment somewhat pushed away by his silliness.


	21. Girl Talk

Stretching your arms over your heard, you moaned as the pain ricocheted through your body. It wasn't as it had been the past couple of days, but you could tell your pain medication had worn off. 

But that didn't matter, because no matter the pain you were in, you still had a huge smile on your face. Last night, even though you had been scared and unsure, Jensen had still been there for you, helping you and giving you the love and support you needed. You couldn't wait until you were back on your feet to make it up to him.

Reaching your arm over, you intended to wrap yourself around your husband, but all you felt was the cool smoothness of the sheets. Rolling over, you held back a moan as the slight movement was agony to your ribs. Jensen was no longer in bed, and when you glanced around, you found he was no longer in the room at all.

Your smile turning to a frown, you turned to your side, disappointed that you had woken up alone. It was then you noticed a yellow rose, one from your flower bed, and a note laying on your nightstand. Picking the rose up, you breathed in the sweet scent before turning your attention to the note. Jensen's handwriting covered most of the paper, big and hurried. 

"I'm so sorry to leave you like this, but they just called me in to set. Something about a scene needing refilmed. I'm not sure how long I will be gone, but I have someone coming over to check on you in a little bit. Don't worry about dinner, I'll pick something up from our favorite Italian restaurant on my way home. Love, Jensen."

Well that explained why you were alone. You understood that his job was demanding, but you had hoped you would have had one more day with him by your side. 

As you lay there, your mood a little sad, your heard the front door open and shut. Things were silent for a moment, then you heard footsteps moving up the stairs.

"Jensen?" You called out, wondering if was done early. You knew it probably wasn't the case, and you could feel your hands grow clammy, scared that someone had broken into your house. 

Looking frantically around you, you grabbed the remote, wincing at your lack of weapons. You were ready to slide out of bed and cower underneath it, when you heard a familiar voice from outside your door. 

"Y/N, are you awake?" Gen's sweet voice rang out before she slowly pushed the door open. Dropping the remote, you gave her a smile moving to sit up in bed. 

"Gen!" You exclaimed, excited and relieved to see your friend. 

She came bustling in, wearing a pair of faded Jean shorts and a white tank top. Her hair was in a loose braid, and she looked ready to hit the beach. "Hey Y/N, Jensen called, asked if I could keep you company. Little did he know I was already on my way over."

You giggled at her, your sadness fading away easily. "I'm so glad to see you." You told her. 

"Well, I already have our day planned. A day of girl talk, good food and sun. It's a gorgeous day out there, we need to enjoy it!" She said, making herself at home. "Now, where are your shorts? You need to get some sun!"

You pointed her in the right direction and soon she had an outfit similiar to hers laid out in the bathroom. "Come on, let's get you changed." She said, helping you out of bed and into the bathroom. Once she left, you struggled into your clothes before staring at yourself in the mirror. Your face looked like a watercolor, a hideous mix of blues, greens and Yellowstone covering your temple and around your eye. Your arm was covered in the white cast, the skin above it full of healing cuts and bruises. While you cringed at your appearance, you knew it was much better than days previous.

Stumbling out into your room, you let Gen wrap a supportive arm around your shoulders before the two of you made your way down the stairs.

It was as hard the second time as the first, but at least this time you had help. Gen helped you out the back door, settling you onto your favorite chase lounge before returning back to the house. Moments later she came back, her hands full of glasses of iced tea, and a tray full of fruit. 

"So, how has everything been going?" She asked you, settling down beside you. 

"Great, I think. Yesterday I remembered more, and Jensen and I spent a quiet day together."

"That's good, isn't it?" She asked, and you nodded. 

"It was great. He was so sweet. Even after I told him I remembered the BBQ, he didn't get mad, or frustrated. He was there for me."

Gen already knew about the BBQ, and her eyes grew big when you told her you remembered it. "Well, that's a step in the right direction."

"True. It's just. I also remembered how drawn I was to Misha, and I think Jensen could sense that. But it's frustrating because I want to be with Jensen, 100 percent. But he wants to wait until I have all my memories." You told her, even though you had a huge secret you couldn't wait to tell someone. You weren't sure if you should tell her first, or wait for Jensen. It was something huge, and you werent sure you could wait much longer. 

"I think he's right. You can't really make a decision until you remember everything, all of your feelings. Even though I know who you will probably pick, but we need you to decide on your own. Or it won't feel right." She explained, and you knew you didn't want to hold back any longer.

Even though your body was still battered and bruised, you felt yourself bouncing up and down in your seat, excited to share your news. "I have something I need to tell you." You admitted. 

She looked at you, her eyebrow raised. "What?"

"This morning when I woke up, I was very disappointed when Jensen wasn't there. Not just because I wanted to see him. But because when I woke up this morning, I remembered everything


	22. It's Now or Never

"Seriously?" Gen exclaimed, a huge smile growing on her face. "Your memories are back? All of them?"

You nodded, your emotions a little muddled. You were beyond excited that your memories were back. But then there was the fact that you remembered everything, including your short but intense infatuation with Misha. "Yeah, and there's a problem with that." You told her, watching her smile disappear.

"I don't know what you're thinking, but I know you had told me you were planning on doing everything to stay with Jensen." She told you, and you nodded.

"Exactly. I want to stay with Jensen. But there is still this feeling for Misha, and I don't want to end things horrible between him and I. Especially since him and Jensen used to be such good friends. I have no idea how to make that better on top of making my marriage work." You explained.

She sighed, understanding where you were coming from. "This will be tough. We need to come up with something. I have a feeling no matter what you do, someone will still end up hurt, and I don't want it to be you because you are trying too hard to make it right for everyone."

"But what else can I do?" You asked her, wanting to stand up and pace, but your body groaned at the thought. 

"I don't know." She answered.

You sat there, thinking about how you could try to make this right, for everyone. "Jensen is bringing dinner home tonight. Maybe I can fancy the place up a little bit, try to make it look more like a date than a hospital dinner. Then during dinner I can tell him my memories are back. Hopefully he will be open to a discussion, and maybe he can help me figure out what to do." You suggested.

"Do you think he will do that? I mean he's been pretty helpful and understanding so far. But having him help you try to make it right with Misha might be pushing it too far." She argued.

"I have to try. I don't know what else to do." You answered her, and she shrugged, giving up her argument.

"Can you help me?" You asked her, and she nodded. Slowly sliding off the lounge, you waddled your way into the kitchen. You couldn't wait until your body no longer hurt and looked like a pincushion. She followed behind, and soon the two of you were leaning against the counter.

"What should we do first?" She asked, and you shrugged. 

"Truthfully? I have no idea. I've never been very good with this sort of thing." You admitted.

She placed her finger on her chin, deep in thought, before her eyes brightened, and she turned to you with a mischievous grin on her face. "You know what? I've got this. Why don't we get you upstairs where you can rest and pamper yourself before hand. Then when he texts that he's on his way, will bring you back down."

You nodded, grateful for her help. She helped you up the stairs, where you headed straight for the bathroom. "A shower first." You told her, before glancing pitifully down at your arm. "Scratch that, a bath it is." 

She laid everything out for you, even turning on the water, before turning to you. "Just yell if you need any help. I'm going to be downstairs."

She left and you carefully sat down on the tub, before moving your legs over and sliding in the warm water. It felt heavenly, and you leaned your head back against the edge, sliding down farther into the water.

You weren't sure how long you stayed in the tub, but your fingers were starting to turn into prunes when you finally pulled the plug. Your sore body feeling much better, you climbed out of the tub, wrapping the huge towel around you. Gen had left some clothes out for you, a simple but nice pair of comfy black pants, and a flowing tank top. Slipping them on, you decided you would apply some make up, making yourself look a little more like normal. Wrapping your hair up high in a towel, you quickly applied a light layer of foundation and eye shadow, wanting to stay as natural as possible. When you stepped out of the bathroom, Gen was standing there, her arms crossed as she waited for you.

"I was wondering how long you were going to stay in there." She teased you. "I was about ready to come in there and see if you had drowned."

"It just felt so good." You answered her.

"Well, I have everything done downstairs, and Jensen just texted you, saying he was on his way. I hope you don't mind that I answered your text." She told you, as you unwound your hair.

"Of course I don't mind. But can you do me a favor and help me with this hair. It's hard enough to deal with anyway, and then with only one hand it's even worse." You said, and she came over, taking the brush from your hand.

As you gently brushed through your tangled hair, you had to admit how much you had grown to trust this woman, how easy she had fit into your life as a friend. "Gen, thank you so much." You told her.

She just chuckled. "It's just hair. It's no big deal."

"No, it's not just that. It's for being there for me. I know we didn't know each other very well when all these issues came up. But you have been there for me, through every step. I can't imagine what I would have done with out you. Thank you for being my friend."

She patted you on the shoulder, letting you know she had heard and understood where you were coming from. "Y/N, you don't have to thank me for that. It's so nice having a friend up here. Before you I felt so alone."

You could see both of you smiling in your reflections in the mirror, and you promised that as soon as this issue with Jensen and Misha was taken care of you would do something nice for her in return.

"There." She told you, and you saw she had softly braided your hair, letting it lay over one shoulder. "Now let's get you downstairs before Jensen shows up."

You felt much stronger, and more in control of your body after the bath, and you were able to take the stairs by yourself. Gen followed closely behind you. Moving into the dining room, you gasped at the wonderful scene in front of you. Gen had gone all out, placing a white tablecloth over the table. Using your fine china, she had set up a romantic setting at the end of the table, complete with flowers, and candles waiting to be lit. A glass of wine was chilling off to the side, along with a pitcher of ice water. The blinds were drawn shut, leaving the only light in the room coming from the chandelier above.

"It's amazing." You told her, wrapping her in a quick hug.

"Thank you." She answered, shuffling her feet at the compliment. "Well, I'm going to go. There's a salad already made in the kitchen, to go with dinner. Good luck, and please let me know what happens."

You nodded, watching as she left, before slowly making your way into the kitchen. You had just started pulling out the salad when you heard the garage door open. "Y/N?" Jensen yelled, trying to figure out where you were.

"In the kitchen." You answered back, and soon he came into sight, his arms full of plastic bags. He looked amazing, wearing his favorite leather coat, a baseball hat, and a plain gray t-shirt tucked into his black jeans.

"What are you doing up and moving?" He asked you, setting the bags down on the counter before coming up behind you, wrapping you tightly in his arms.

"Just getting things ready for dinner." You answered, missing his arms as he stepped back. 

He noticed the salad, taking it from your hands and placing it near the rest of the food. "You didn't need to. But thank you. Now go relax, and I will bring the food out."

You nodded, moving to leave but stopping to tell him. "By the way, we are eating in the dining room tonight."

He nodded, busy pulling cartons out of the bags. He was only a step behind you, and you weren't even able to sit down in your chair before he was placing your favorite Italian dish in front of you. "Wow, this looks amazing Y/N. You didn't need to go all out though. I hope you didn't tire yourself out."

Smelling the amazing food, you chuckled when your stomach growled. "No, I actually had help. But I wanted something special for us. We've had so many bad things lately, we needed something like this."

He gave you a huge smile, before returning to the kitchen for the rest of the food. You poured him a glass of wine, sticking to water for yourself. Returning he placed the salad in front of you, before sitting down.

"It smells amazing." You told him, picking up your fork to take a bite. 

"Yes it does. And the dining room looks amazing. Thank you for doing this." He told you, before taking a bite of his lasagna.

"Well, I had something I wanted to tell you, and I wanted everything perfect." You admitted, not missing the look of worry that crossed his face.

"Okay, I'm listening." He said, taking a big gulp of wine before sitting it down. You could tell he was nervous, and you didn't blame him. Not after everything you've put him through.

"This morning when I woke up, I was very disappointed that you weren't there." You started, but he interrupted you.

"I know. I'm so sorry, but I left you a note." He apologized.

"Don't. I know, and it's not because of that. It's because when I woke up this morning, I remembered." You told him.

"You remembered what?" He asked, almost squirming in his seat.

"Everything." You said simply. 

It took a moment for your news to settle in, and then you could see the fight of emotions on his face. Elation that your memory was finally back, but also fear, that now that you remembered you would be leaving him. "What does that mean for us?" He asked you quietly, his gaze staring deeply into yours, his green eyes shining with emotion.


	23. What Does This Mean

"What does this mean for us?" Jensen's question rolled around in your head. He was staring at you, his grip tight on the glass of wine in his hands, his teeth nervously tugging on his bottom lip. You could tell he wasn't sure he wanted the answer, that he was still scared and unsure. Afraid that you might end up picking Misha over him.

You took a sip of water, quenching your suddenly parched throat, before finally answering him. "This means a lot of things, not just for us, but for the people around us. Jensen, getting my memories back has been somewhat of a big relief for me. I remember meeting you for the first time, and how easy it was to fall in love with the amazing man behind those stunning green eyes."

He still seemed unsure, because you hadn't actually gotten to the point of your story yet. You felt horrible for dragging it on, but you really wanted to make sure you got your point across. Setting your glass of water farther away from you, you slid your chair out, scooting it closer to Jensen's, taking his hand in yours. His eyes had taken on the darkened hue of pine needles in the candle light, and for a moment you lost yourself in the depth of love and compassion shining from within them.

"Jensen, I want to go back to that. Where the two of us are so deeply in love, that we don't even think about it. Back to when we don't have all of this hanging over our heads. I know that's almost impossible, but I would love to try. But to do that, a couple of things need to happen." You told him, then bit your lip, nervously awaiting his reaction.

He had gripped your hand tightly through your entire mini speech, his eyes never leaving your face as you spoke. But when you were done, his gaze tilted down, landing on your joined hands, and he was silent. It was your turn to squirm in your seat, waiting for him to say something, anything. It had only been days ago that he had promised to stick with you, to work this out. But you knew things changed, feelings changed, and now that your memories were back, he might not feel the same.

"You don't know how much I want that. To start over, to pretend that I never walked in on that kiss between Misha and you. But in order to do that, we need to clear the air. Don't you think?" He finally said, his head tilting back up, his gaze once again connecting with yours.

"Of course." You answered quickly, wanting to do anything to make this right. "Just let me know what you need. I want to do anything to make this work."

He nodded, licking his bottom lip before continuing on. "Then I need to know. What do you really feel for Misha? I remember you saying that it wasn't what it looked like. And I know Misha's told me time and time again, but I need to hear it from your lips before I can truly put it behind me."

You gulped, knowing this conversation had to happen but you weren't good with words and you didn't want it to spiral out of control. "Just listen at first please. I'm going to start at the beginning, and it might be tough." You pleaded. 

A slight nod was all the answer he gave you. 

Taking another sip of your water, you continued. "It all started at the Vegas convention. He came up to me, and was all charming. It threw me at first, and I tried everything to stay away. But he was always thrown in my way, and he was persistent."

Jensen's hand had tightened in yours as you talked, but it was the only indication that he was affected by your words. "We both tried to fight our attraction to each other. At least he said he did. I know I did, I kept pleading with him, telling him how happy I was with you. But we kept getting thrown together, and he was so, there." You said, at a lost for the right word.

"Then, at the BBQ, it all came to a head. He kissed me, and said he couldn't control my feelings for me. But I was so confused I told him we needed to talk. That's why he came back that morning."

"That's why you couldn't sleep that night." Jensen interrupted, and you nodded. 

"True. I was so stressed. I knew what I had with Misha was just an infatuation, and I didn't want to mess up what you and I have. And I didn't want to hurt your friendship with him either. So when he showed up that morning, I told him I couldn't. That whatever was happening between us couldn't anymore. Then he leaned in to kiss me goodbye, and that's when you came in."

You took a deep breath, feeling a heavy weight lift from your chest. It felt so much better, having no secrets between you and Jensen. Now you just had to wait, to see what he said. He pushed his hair back, and you were worried he was going to walk away. But he leaned down, taking your face between his hands, kissing you gently on the lips. "You don't know how scared I was you were going to leave me when your memories returned. But hearing the words, from your lips, has given me so much relief. I love you so freaking much."

"I love you too. But Jensen, I don't think our problems our completely taken care of." You told him, elated at the way he had taken the news. 

"What do you mean?" He asked, sitting back down in his chair.

"I want to make things right. With everyone. I know I need to talk to Misha to make him understand. I want everything to work out so your friendship isn't ruined. Because of me."

"Misha is great. But I'm more worried about our relationship." He told you. 

Shaking your head, you tried to get him to see your side. "I do too. But I know I won't feel right, things won't feel right until this all gets figured out. I won't be able to forgice myself until it's all worked out."

"I've already forgiven you. Isn't that enough?" He asked, and you could see he truly meant it. 

"That's a start. But I really need this. Can you please help me?" You pleaded. 

"Of course. Anything to make this all work out." He agreed. "What do you want me to do?"


	24. Meet Up

Ringing. That's all you heard as you held your phone up to your ear. You were waiting for Misha to pick it up, a little shake to your hands as you listened to each ring echo in your ear. One ring, two rings, you had almost given up home that he would answer when you heard his voice at the other end of the line. "Hello? Y/N?"

"Hi Misha." You said softly. "Is this an okay time to talk?"

You heard some shuffling on the other end of the line, him mutter under his breath, then he came back. "Yeah, I guess. I have to be back on set in ten minutes though."

"You're still filming?" You asked him, running your finger along your water glass that had been left behind. Jensen had gathered all the dishes, promising to do clean up while you called Misha. 

You heard him chuckle. "Some of us weren't lucky enough to take time off."

"I guess I will make this short and quick." You told him. "Jensen and I want to meet up with you, to have a chance for all three of us to talk, face to face. We have some things that need aired out, and I thought that would be the best way."

"Wait, does this mean your memories are back?" He asked, completely ignoring the fact you had asked for a meeting.

"Yeah, they came back in full force this morning." You told him.

He was quiet for a moment, and you wondered if he had accidentally ended the call. But then you heard him. "So I guess this means you are still picking him." He said, and you could detect a hint of sadness in his voice.

"Misha, that's why I want us to get together and talk. But yes, I want to fix things with my husband. But please, can we pick a time and place?" You asked him.

You heard him sigh. "Sure. How about I swing by your place? Maybe tonight if we finish filming early enough. If not then tomorrow morning."

"Sounds good." You told him. "See you then." 

You hung up, dropping your phone to the table. Rubbing your temples, you couldn't wait for the day to be over. It had been so full of emotional stress that you were exhausted. But you were far from done, especially if Misha did come over tonight.

Deciding you needed to let Jensen know about the probable meeting, you slowly made your way into the kitchen, your body sore from sitting so long. As you turned to round the corner, you stopped when you heard Jensen talking to someone.

His voice was a little hushed, as if he didn't want you to overhear, so instead of walking right into the room, you stayed hidden in the hallway, listening in to his conversation.

"Jared, she's calling him right now." You heard Jensen say. "Gen told you? Yeah her memories are back."

He was silent for a moment, Jared must have been talking, and you almost moved into the kitchen, but something held you back. "She wants to meet up with the guy. She says it so we can all work this out, and get our marriage back on track, along with my friendship with Misha. But, I'm not sure I really want that." He said, and your heart fell to the floor, shattering into a million pieces. You couldn't believe what he was saying. Especially after you had just sat at dinner together, him saying he forgave you, and wanting to get back together. Was that all just a game he was playing? Maybe he felt sorry for you, and was pacifying you until you were healed and he could leave.

You turned around, not wanting to hear the rest of the conversation, knowing it would hurt too much. Sniffling away tears, you grabbed the tissue box from the downstairs bathroom, before going outside. You didn't bother turning any lights on, you stumbled your way to your lounge, dropping into it. You had no energy left, what little had been there was completely sucked out by what you had just heard.

Your entire body hurt. Not just from the fact that you had just jarred your sore ribs, but from the fact that Jensen had been playing you this entire time, and didn't want to get back together with you. While it might not show on the outside, this news hurt worse than the injuries you received from your wreck. 

As the tears cascaded down your cheeks, you wished you hadn't gotten your memories back. Maybe life would have been easier, maybe Jensen wouldn't have said those things to Jared, if you didn't remember everything. You were so wrapped up in despair that you didn't hear the back door open or shut. But you did see the back light turn on, and you quickly tried to hide the fact that you had been crying. You didn't want Jensen to know how much he had just ripped your heart apart.

"Y/N? Are you out here?" He asked, and you knew he couldn't see you over the back of the lounge. Before you could answer, you heard his footsteps coming closer, and then he was standing right behind you, blocking out the light. "What are you doing out here? It's freezing!" He said, and he took the blanket from in his arms and draped it over you.

"I just wanted to come out here and think." You told him, keeping your gaze from him, knowing your tears had left you looking like a raccoon.

He grabbed one of the chairs, pulling it over so he could sit next to you. "What's up? Did the call with Misha go okay?" He asked casually.

"I guess." You said, and your voice must have betrayed you, because he scooted closer, moving his hand to tilt your face so you could look at him.

"You've been crying." He said, worry filling his eyes. "What's wrong? Did Misha do something? I swear I will..."

"No, it wasn't Misha." You told him, feeling the tears rising to the surface once again.

"Then what?" He asked, confusion filling his face.

"If you don't want to work this out, why didn't you tell me?" You whispered, cringing as you waited for him to confirm his words.

Before he could say anything, the front door bell rang. The two of you stayed still, neither one moving to get it. Finally Jensen stood. "This conversation is far from over." He promised. He strode back inside, returning minutes later with Misha in tow. Misha was dressed casually in a pair of faded, low slung jeans, with a pale blue button down that just seemed to accentuate his eyes. It was the first time you had seen him since the hospital, and in a small way, you were glad he had come by today. Because you weren't sure you wanted to finish your conversation with Jensen.

But as you thought about it, you came to the realization that maybe it was for the best. That way all three of you could air your issues out, and come to some sort of understanding. Misha looked at you, then Jensen, then back at you. "Is this a bad time? Because I can always come back tomorrow."


	25. It's Now or Never

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath. With Misha there, you knew everything was going to come to a head, but you weren't sure you were ready. Especially after hearing Jensen talking on the phone with Jared.

"I can come back." Misha said, back stepping as he took in your tear stained face, and Jensen's frustrated grimace.

"No, please stay." You whispered. You wanted him there, just in case things ended badly between you and Jensen. It was selfish on your part, but you wanted someone to be there for you. 

"Okay." He said, though he still sounded unsure. He sat down at the table, while Jensen stood on the other side of you. You could have laughed at how ironic this was, if your heart wasn't still hurting that is.

"Between the three of us, there is a lot that we need to talk about." You started. "But before that, I need to know something."

"Sure." They both agreed quickly. 

"I guess this is more for Jensen, than for you." You apologized to Misha. He looked a little bit like a kicked puppy, but gave you a tiny shake of his to let you know he understood.

"Jensen, do you still want to work things out between us? Do you still want our marriage to work?" You asked him, even though you cringed at hearing the answer, especially after what you heard him say over the phone.

"Of course I do!" He said adamantly, sitting back down on the chair. "I told you I do. That I want to forget what happened, and start again. To be happy again."

You felt tears threaten to fall once again, and you brushed them away, frustrated at your weakness. "Really? Because that's not what it sounded like when you were talking to Jared." You told him, seeing Misha's eyes grew round in surprise.

"What? That's not what I... What did you hear?" He stuttered, his tone uncertain.

You tried to stand up, but just ended up grimacing in pain as your ribs ached from the movement. "Damn it Y/N, that's not what I meant at all. If you had stayed to listen, then you would have heard the rest of it!"

"What was that? That you were with me right now because you pitied me? Or because you were jealous Misha was going to get the girl?" You spat, not even recognizing yourself in your anger.

"No, you would have heard me saying that I didn't want to do this meeting." He answered quietly, his eyes begging your you to understand. "Y/N, it's just, I'm still afraid that I'm going to lose you to Misha, and I thought this meeting was going to be for you to tell me goodbye. I wasn't ready for that. I almost lost you, and I don't want that to happen again."

You melted at his words, his tear filled eyes showing how desperate, but truthful he was being. "Thank god." You whispered, before he pulled you into his arms. "I'm never leaving you. Please don't leave me." He whispered, and it broke your heart that this strong, amazing man was so unsecure about the love the two of you shared.

"Never." You whispered, feeling horrible that Misha was there to witness it, but also a little glad at the same time. Because this showed him who you had picked, making it more clear than any words ever could.

You sat back up, making Jensen give you a curious glance. "There, now that that is taken care of, can we please clean the air between all of us?"

"How do you want to do that?" Misha asked, his voice a little cold, and you didn't blame him. You just wished that by the end of the evening, hearts would be on the way to being mended. 

"I want us to talk it all out, maybe drink, and try to get back to the way things used to be. Or at least, find a new way to deal with each other. Because you are friends, or at least you were. And you work together, every day. I can't have the two of you glaring daggers at each other all the time." You told them.

"Fine. Let's talk." Jensen agreed.

You looked over his way. "Jensen, you might not like some of the things being said, but always remember. I picked you."

He nodded, grasping your hand, and you started off the conversation. "Misha, first of all I want you to understand, I'm with Jensen, now and forever. But, if I hadn't had this wonderful husband here, whom I don't deserve, you would be the first man I would choose. Your funny, and smart, and you sure know how to kiss." You said, not missing the look of jealousy that crossed Jensen's face. Misha, on the other hand, sat there calmly, staring at you, listening to what you have to say with a hooded look oh his face.

"But I'm sorry Misha. We need to have this talk, then forget about everything that's happened. For your sake along with ours. Do you think you can do that?" You asked him.

He nodded. "I can do that. During your time in the hospital I had plenty of time to think, and feel ashamed for my actions. I know those feelings will be hard to put behind me, but I promise I can do it. I will miss you Y/N, but I'm hoping we can continue on as friends."

Giving him a soft smile, you turned to Jensen. "Jensen, I know Misha and I messed a lot of stuff up. But do you think you and Misha could go back to being friends?" You asked him, watching as both men stared at each other. It was a silent battle of the alphas, and for a moment you wondered if everything you had worked to would be pushed away by the pride of men. But you watched as Jensen sighed, his shoulders drooping a little, before he strode forward. Misha was watching, uncertainly, ready to take a step back, but Jensen surprised the both of you by holding his hand out.

Misha took it, and Jensen spoke, his words low. "Misha, I want you to know that I forgive you for going after my wife, but I will never forget it." Without another word, Jensen reared his other hand back, punching Misha square in the jaw. "That is for going after my wife in the first place."

Misha stood there, rubbing his jaw, waiting for another punch, which never came. "I deserved that, and a lot more." He admitted.

"Yeah you do." Jensen agreed. "But, I don't want anymore discord between me and my wife, or me and my friends. I just want this all to be over. And to go back to having friends, filming our show, and doing our conventions. Can we do that?" Jensen asked tiredly, and Misha nodded.

"Don't worry Jensen. You won't have to worry about me doing anything stupid ever again." He promised, earning a chuckle from Jensen.

"I doubt that." Jensen muttered. "I'm willing to give this a try. But just this warning, and then it's gone, never to be talked about again. I know you will be spending time with Y/N. But if you touch her the wrong way, a simple punch will be the least of your worries."

Misha nodded. "I understand. And believe me, I don't think of Y/N like that anymore. She's like a sister to me, I promise. But now I think that since everything is cleared, I'm going to take off, let the two of you have some time together."

"Thank you Misha." You told him, Jensen helping you off of the chair. You walked over to him, giving him a quick hug, your eyes on Jensen the entire time to let him know it was just friendly. Misha stepped away, giving Jensen a pat on the back before going back in your house to leave.

You sighed, relieved that that horrible conversation was over with. Jensen sat down in your lounge, and you glared at him for taking your chair away. Moving to sit in his chair, you were surprised when you felt his arms reach around you, gently pulling you down onto his lap. Melting in his embrace, you leaned back, letting your head rest against his chest. The two of you stayed like that, listening to the heart beat of each other, content in the company of one another.

"I was so worried when I overheard your conversation." You admitted, as you drew circles with your finger on his chest.

His hand that was wrapped around your shoulder tightened for a moment. "I'm so sorry that you got worked up over that. But trust me, I don't want to leave you. Those nights apart were the worst nights of my life. I never want that to happen again."

"Let's promise each other that we won't do anything like this again." You pleaded with him, feeling his arms tighten around you. "Nothing is worth the pain I caused you. If I could take it back I would."

"I know. But all we can do is move on from it, learn from our mistakes. And we will do it, and survive. Together." He told you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "I love you."

"I love you too." You answered him, closing your eyes, amazed that this man had stuck with you through pain and heartbreak. Hopefully it would make your marriage that much stronger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of the Jensen version. I plan on adding more with Misha to the end of this.


	26. Misha's Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ** I've thought hard, and decided the least confusing way to do this would probably be to start this during the meeting between the reader, Jensen, and Misha. So forget the last chapter ever happened, and read this. Unless you wanted the reader to stick with Jensen, that is.**

You were still reeling from the conversation you had just overheard. Here you were trying so hard to make your relationship with Jensen work, but maybe that wasn't the right thing for everyone involved. So many thoughts were swirling around your mind, making it hard to concentrate, and you had both men staring down at you, waiting for you to talk.

Why did you have to invite Misha over tonight, you wondered to yourself. You really wanted to talk things over with Jensen, figure things out before you moved on to figuring things out with Misha. But seeing his blue eyes staring down at you, getting lost in them, calmed you down. You felt your heart slowly go back to normal, and you were so caught up in his gaze you didn't hear Jensen clear his throat.

"Y/N, Misha, I really think we need to sit down. And talk, about everything." Jensen said, snapping you out of your own thoughts. You agreed with him. Looking over, you stared at the man you had fallen in love with, and married. He was still the same, wonderful person you had married, but lately things seemed different, forced. 

"I agree." You said, as Misha pulled a chair over to sit down across from you. "But I need to go first. Please."

Jensen nodded, as did Misha, and you knew that no matter what happened here, you had two amazing, supportive men in your life. "Jensen, after I got off the phone with Misha, I overheard you talking to Jared. About how you couldn't do this anymore. Was that true?"

He sighed, rubbing his hand over his mouth, a sure sign that he was frustrated, and getting emotional. "Y/N, I love you. I really do. And I've tried to make this marriage stay together. But then I go back to thinking, to seeing all the times you and Misha were together. The little touches, the glances the two of you tried to hide. You probably thought I hadn't noticed them, but I had. And I don't truly know if I want to stay in a marriage with a woman in love with two men." He said bluntly.

You nodded, knowing that even though his words were true, they still hurt. "I don't know what to say." You whispered.

"Can I say something?" Misha asked, knowing he was still slightly the third wheel in this conversation. Both you and Jensen shrugged, letting him have his say. "I don't know what will happen, but I need to say this. I've been in relationships before. Hell, I was in a long one with my high school sweetheart. But I have never felt anything for anybody, the way I feel for you Y/N. And no matter who you pick, I just wanted you to know that. And I will support your pick, no matter what."

You felt as if you were being pulled two different directions, a game of verbal tug of war. From the beginning of your feelings with Misha, you had always held back, wanting to stick with Jensen, to work things out with him. But Misha had always been there, like a flame and you were the moth. You couldn't help but be attracted to him, and you would love to see where things went with him.

"Y/N, it's up to you." Jensen started, and you were shocked at what he was saying. "This needs to be over with, and soon. You need to make up your mind. But if you stay with me, it needs to be because you love me. Truly and fully. I don't want you staying with me, but still loving and pinning for him. But if you truly love him, then go to him. It would be better for everyone involved. I will survive."

"I agree with Jensen. No matter who you pick, I will support it." Misha said, and you kept moving your glance between both of them, your heart rate picking up. You had figured it would always come down to your choice, after all you were the one in love with two men. 

You glanced at Jensen, knowing you loved this man, your husband. He was kind, and compassionate, everything you could want in a husband. But then there was Misha, who was spontaneous and fun, and so full of life. He had come in so easy, and swept you off of your feet, even when you hadn't wanted to be. His soul seemed to be connected to yours. While your love for Jensen had been a slow burning flame, your love for Misha had come on, and stayed hot. 

You wanted to run and hide, not having to make a choice. It was hard, nearly impossible, but in your heart, you had already made it. "Do you think I could talk to each of you alone?" You asked, thinking things would go more smoothly this way.

"Sure." They both answered, and Misha stood up. "I'll let the two of you talk first."

After he left, both you and Jensen sat there, your hand clasped lightly in his. "Do you remember the first time we met?" You asked him, his smile your answer.

"Yeah, we were both down in Austin, in the ice cream store. You dropped ice cream all down my shirt." He said. "We became close friend after that."

"Yeah we were great friends." You said, watching as the light dawned in his eyes. "Do you think we pushed it too hard, tried to make our relationship fit something it wasn't?" You asked him.

"Maybe. But you were always there, it seemed like the natural thing." He answered.

"Jensen, I'm sure you have already figured out my choice. And it wasn't with an easy heart. I love you, will always love you. But sometimes it seems more like a friend than a lover." You admitted, waiting for him to stand up, to yell, to punch something.

What he did surprised you. Leaning forward, he pressed a gentle kiss on your forehead. "I was always afraid this day was going to come. I always knew that my feelings for you were more than your feelings for me. That's why I wasn't so surprised when this Misha thing came up. It hurt, man did it hurt. But I think the reason I didn't get so mad was because I had always known that someday it would happen." He admitted.

"Do you think we could stay friends?" You asked. "Damn I sound so cliche, but it's true. I don't know if I can go through with this if I won't have you in my life." You told him, tears forming in your eyes at the thought of losing him. It was selfish to ask that of him, but you couldn't help it.

"Sweetheart, it might kill me to see you with another man, especially one I see every day. But give me time, and we could probably make that work. I care about you too much to let you leave my life completely." He said.

"Thank you." You said simply.

He sighed, and it was then you noticed the tears shimmering in his eyes, and you felt your heartbreak for the pain you were causing him. "If you don't mind me, I'm gonna head inside, maybe even head over to Jared's tonight. Give you and Misha some privacy." He told you.

You watched as he walked away, seeing a part of your life leaving. It hurt, but in a small sense you were excited for the next step. As soon as Jensen walked inside, Misha came out. His shoulders were a little hunched, his gaze on the ground. He seemed nervous and unsure


	27. Talking to Misha

You sat there quietly, waiting for him to sit down, thinking the words out in your head before you tried to speak them. You heard the outtake of breath as he sat down across from you, and moving your gaze from your feet to him, you saw his pale face. His shoulders were slumped, a frown marring his face, a look of utter sadness and defeat on his face.

"Misha." You started to speak, but he stopped you.

"Listen Y/N, I know what you've already picked, and I just want to say thank you for attempting to talk to me afterwards." He muttered, and you sat there shocked. Misha thought that you had picked Jensen, and was already resigning himself to that fact.

"Misha, wait!" You exclaimed, as he stood up to leave. "You have no idea what I picked. Sit down, so we can talk."

He sat down, but the sullen look stayed on his face. He didn't say anything else, but sat there, his hands on his knees.

"Misha, I didn't pick Jensen." You started off with, wanting to relieve some of the stress he was feeling.

"But the two of you talked for so long, I figured..." He started, his eyes big and full of hope.

You nodded, scooting forward in your chair, your painful ribs reminding you that wasn't a good choice. "We did talk, a long time. About how Jensen was always more invested in our relationship than I was. How we started out as friends, but then we thought we'd try something more. But it didn't work, at least for me. Jensen said he knew this would happen, someday. And that he was glad it was with someone like you."

Misha wiped his hand across his mouth, opening and closing his mouth a couple of times, unable to speak. You took pity on him. "Misha, what I had with Jensen was special. I love him, but those feelings were more of a friend than a lover. But my feelings towards you? They run deep, and hot, and we are only at the beginning of our relationship. Who knows what happens when we are actually given a chance to explore those feelings."

"I never thought this is what I would hear when I came out here. I stayed in your house, in your living room, imagining with horror all the nice ways you would try to say you were staying with Jensen. Then I thought of rushing out here, and telling you to stay with him. I didn't want to be the one to break up your relationship. I love you Y/N, but Jensen means a lot to me too." Misha said, and you could tell how much he had been hurting while waiting.

"I know." You agreed quietly. "But Jensen said, that given time, he will try to make the friendship thing work, with both of us. I know it's going to be hard, but hopefully we can all move past this."

Misha dropped your hand, before grabbing you and pulling you over onto his lap, holding you tight to his chest. You held in the moan from the pain the movement caused, not wanting to upset him. You just wanted to soak in the feel of his arms wrapped around you. "I hope so. But I can't tell you enough how grateful I am that you are giving this, us, a chance to work. You will never forget it. I promise you." He said, before pressing his chapped lips to your soft ones. It was nothing like the first kisses the two of you had shared. While those had been hurried, with you fighting your urge the entire time, this one was sweet, full of an emotion the two of you had been to rushed to feel. 

"I can't believe your mine. That I can kiss you whenever I want. Or touch you." He murmured in your ear, running his hand up and down your arm, sending goosebumps throughout your body. "It feels so right."

You had to admit, it did feel right. Now that you weren't trying to stay with Jensen, or fighting your desire for Misha, you saw him in a different light. You saw how deeply blue his eyes were in the moonlight, how his chin was strong and angular. How he gazed down at you with nothing but love and adoration in his eyes.

"Misha?" You said his name softly. 

"Hmm." He asked, before bending down and nibbling on your neck. 

"Can we go back to your place? It doesn't feel right, staying here, in the house I built with Jensen." You told him truthfully. It really didn't. Jensen was everywhere in this house. He had been through every step of the decorating with you, and while you weren't officially cheating on him, it still felt wrong.

"Of course." He answered quickly, before helping you to your feet. "Let's get some of your stuff, and then we can go." 

Holding your hand, he guided you back into the house. "Misha, can you grab my pain pills and stuff? They're in the kitchen. First cupboard on the left."

He nodded, leaving you to make the slow climb to your room. Opening it, you looked around, noticing all the little symbols of your marriage with Jensen. There was the picture of the two of you, hanging over the dresser, from your wedding. On your nightstand was a picture from your honeymoon. Your clothes intermingled with his, and it made you hurt, to know that you were ending this. In your heart you knew it was the right thing, but it was still hard, and you felt tears gathering in your eyes as you reached up and grabbed a suitcase from your closet. Throwing in whatever you could think of, you brushed away tears as you zipped it back up.

Dragging it down the stairs, you saw Misha waiting for you at the bottom. Without a word he took it from you, and the two of you left through the front door. As he carried your suitcase to his car, you turned to look at was once your home. You weren't sure if it ever would be again. You felt sad, that this part of your life was ending. It was hard to take in, and you felt the tears start to gather in your eyes once again.

Feeling arms wrapping around you from behind you, you leaned back into Misha's strong, sturdy chest. "I'm sorry. It's just harder than I thought it would be."

He leaned down, pressing his lips to your temple. "I wouldn't expect anything different. You're leaving a part of your life behind, and that has to hurt. But I will be with you, and I will support you through all of this. I love." He whispered into your ear, making you smile.

"I love you too. And I can't wait to see where the second part of my life leads." You told him, before sliding into his car.


	28. A New Home

It was sad, really it was. But during this whole fiasco between you, Jensen and Misha, you had never been to his house. You watched as the lights passed by your window, the city leaving you behind for more of a secluded neighborhood with lots of trees, and houses that would fit into the living room of your old house.

Glancing over to where Misha sat, his concentration on the road, you could tell he was nervous and unsure. His shoulders were tight, his hands fisted around the steering wheel. He had a slight frown on his face, and you were worried he was already regretting his decision, and yours, to stay together.

"Is everything okay?" You asked quietly as he made a turn onto a secluded street. He glanced over at you, before looking back at the road. However he took his hand off the steering wheel, lacing his fingers with yours.

"Yes, no." He stuttered and your heart plummeted. "It's just. You've never been to my house before, and it's completely different than what you and Jensen had. It's half the size of your house, and I built it with my own hands." He explained.

"I'm sure I will love it. I was never used to big and fancy until Jensen bought that house. As long as you have a backyard that I can lounge in occasionally, we should be fine." You assured him, watching as some of the tension eased from his shoulders.

Your fingers stayed laced together as he made a couple more turns before stopping in front of a simple, two story house. It was hard to see much through the darkness, but you loved the big bay window in the front.

Stepping out, you waited as Misha grabbed your bags, before following him to the door. There was a porch on the front, with a couple of wicker chairs off to the side. The front door opened, and Misha stepped inside, flicking on a light. You stepped inside, immediately falling in love with the open and airy space in front of you. 

"It's beautiful!" You told him, turning as you took it all in. It was nowhere near as fancy as the house you and Jensen had shared, but you were grateful for that. The living room had a tan couch and chair, facing a fireplace. A wooden coffee table was placed in between, full of papers and coffee cups. Across the room was a large, dining room table, made out of a slab of wood. You could see the kitchen off to the other end, but not enough to get a sense of it. 

Misha grabbed your bags, climbing up the stairs that were off to the side. "Come on, it's late and we need to get you settled in." He told you. Following him up the stairs, you came to a small landing that overlooked the main part of the house.

"Misha, I can't believe you built this! How long did it take you? It's spectacular!" You babbled on, loving the place.

"A couple of years. I had some friends help, but it was mainly me." He said, acting a little bashful at your praise. "Here, you can sleep in the guest room tonight."

You turned to face him, a little surprised at his words. "The guest room?"

He had dropped your bags and was standing there, rubbing the back of his neck. "Look, it's not like I don't want you in my bed. But you just left your husband, and I was thinking we could take it slow for a couple of days." He explained.

"Yeah, because this entire relationship has been slow." You smarted back, a little frustrated but understanding where he was coming from.

"Listen, I promise. Just for a day or two. I know I started things off wrong, and now I want to make it up to you." He said, before pressing a kiss to your cheek. "Goodnight. I'm the next door if you need anything."

You watched him walk to his room, before you entered yours. It was nice, though sparsely decorated, with a green and tan quilt on the iron bed frame, and a landscape picture hanging above. There was an antique dresser across from you, with a picture frame on top. Picking it up, you smiled at the younger version of Misha.

A door led off to the bathroom, and you slipped inside, changing into your pajamas before washing your face. Turning the light off, you slid into bed, trying to get comfortable in the strange bed. You tossed and turned, trying to find a soft spot. But you weren't used to sleeping alone, and this bed was a lot harder than your old one.

After over an hour, you had given up. Slipping on your robe, you opened your door, tip toeing your way to Misha's door. It was cracked open slightly, and you pushed it open. It was hard to see, but you saw a king sized bed in the middle of the large room, and a figure spread out on their stomach. "Misha?" You whispered, wondering if he was awake.

When he didn't stir, you considered turning around. But the prospect of spending the rest of the night by yourself sent you further into his room. "Misha?" You tried again, this time a little louder, and you watched as he struggled to wake up. 

"Y/N?" He muttered, his voice extra deep with sleep. "Is everything okay?"

"I couldn't sleep." You explained, standing next to his bed. "After everything, I just hated being by myself."

He rubbed his eyes, before sitting up in bed. "I understand. Why don't you crawl into the other side." He said, not even fighting you. You raced around the other side, stubbing your toe on the edge of the bed. Muttering under your breath, you hobbled on one foot until you slid into bed.

At first it was a little awkward, both of you laying on your backs, afraid to move. But then Misha moved his arm, pulling you to him until you were curled up against his side, your head resting on his chest. His arm came to rest on yours, and you instantly felt better. "Thanks." You whispered, already feeling sleepy.

"Anything for you." He told you, kissing your forehead as you felt yourself drifting off to sleep.


	29. Trouble

Stretching, you felt something warm and solid behind you. It was completely spooned around you, a heavy arm across your middle. Trying to not wake him, you took your time turning until you came face to face with Misha. He was sound asleep, his long, dark lashes brushing his cheekbones. It was your first chance ever to study him, really study him without any consequences. 

His blue eyes had been one of the first things that had suckered you in, how completely blue they were. Not pale, or a navy blue, but a bright, shiny royal blue. But now that his eyes were closed you could concentrate on his other features. Like how smooth his skin was, no freckles or moles marring it. Or his lips. They might seem a little rough and chapped, but they were really smooth. While they weren't as plump as Jensen's, they were still full, and you loved the feel of them against yours. You loved his cleft chin, and the dark stubble that was already covering his face. You loved how tousled his hair was, as if the two of you had spent a busy night making love.

Just the thought of that brought a blush to your cheeks. While you were in love with the man, the two of you hadn't even come close to talk about that aspect of your relationship. Your kisses had been heated, but you weren't sure if you were ready to jump that far in, not yet.

Feeling the urge to use the bathroom, you slid out from underneath his arm. Deciding to use the bathroom connected to your room, you slipped into the hallway, grabbing your phone. Checking for messages, you were surprised to see three from Gen. Opening them up, you saw the urgency in her texts. "Are you awake yet?" "Y/N, have you been on the internet yet?" "Damn it Y/N, wake up and call me!"

Not wanting to disturb Misha, you went down the stairs, unlocking the back door and stepping into the back yard. Taking a moment to admire his view, you wondered what was so important that Gen was texting you at 8 in the morning. 

Quickly dialing her number, you waited for her to pick up. You didn't have to wait long before you heard her pick up. "Y/N, thank god."

"Hey Gen. Whats up?" You asked, as you perched on the edge of one of Misha's patio chairs.

"So, I heard about you and Jensen. I'm sorry it didn't work out. But you're with Misha now?" She asked you, not getting to the point.

"Yeah, Jensen and I decided it was for the best. And I really do love Misha. It was such a hard choice, but it felt right." You told her, grateful to talk to somebody about it.

"You know even though I'm with Jared, I will support you with whatever choice you make. But that's not why I called." She said.

"I appreciate that. It's so nice having you as a friend. But what's up?" You told her.

"So that mean's you haven't been on the internet at all. How about I come over, and talk to you in person." She suggested.

"Sure. Misha's not up yet, but I don't think he will mind." Rattling off his address, you hung up before heading back into the house. 

Standing in the middle of the kitchen, you looked around for the coffee maker. You could really use at least one cup, if not more because it sounded like Gen had some news that you weren't going to take very well. 

You jumped when you felt a pair of arms wrap around you from behind. "Morning. I was a little disappointed when I woke up and you weren't in bed with me." Misha whispered into your ear.

You turned so you were facing him, giving him a quick peck on the lips. "Sorry, I had to use the bathroom. Then Gen called." You explained.

"Gen called? What did she want?" He asked, as he grabbed an old fashioned coffee maker. Filling it with water and grounds, he placed it on the stove to perk. 

"I don't know. She didn't tell me. But it sounded really important. Actually she's on her way here now." You said. "Maybe I should go get dressed." You said, looking down at your night outfit of shorts and a tank top.

"Me too." Misha agreed. He was still dressed in his boxer briefs, and a snug fitting t-shirt. Both of you rushed up the stairs, heading to your respective rooms. Grabbing a pair of jeans, and a loose, flowing blouse, you put them on before pulling your hair up into a simple ponytail. By the time you were done, Misha was knocking at your door. 

"Coffee's ready." He told you, standing there in a pair of faded, low slung jeans and a gishwhes t-shirt. Following him down, you let him pour you a cup of coffee. "Do you know what's sad? I don't even know how you take your coffee." He admitted, making the both of you realize how much you still had to learn about each other.

Taking it black, you were ready to take a sip when you heard a knock on the door. "I've got it." You told Misha, setting your cup down. Gen stood at the door, wearing a pair of light tan colored pants along with a navy tank top. 

Giving her a hug, you moved to the side, letting her into the house. "Wow, Misha I like your house." She said, just as Misha came from the kitchen.

"Thanks, built her myself." He answered her.

"Do you want some coffee?" You asked, and she nodded.

"How about I bring you two coffee, and you go relax on the porch. It''s a gorgeous morning." Misha suggested.

You agreed, opening the patio door and letting her go first. Once the two of you were settled, Misha came out with the coffee, joining you outside.

"So what was so important you couldn't talk to me over the phone?" You finally got to the point.

She sighed, looking down at her coffee. "Somehow, someone found out about last night. I'm not sure how, Jensen promised he didn't say anything.But it's all over the tabloids, and Y/N, they aren't painting you in a good light."


	30. Shock

It was a good thing you were sitting down. As soon as Gen came out with her news, your entire body felt weak, your hands and knees shaking. Misha came even closer to you, placing his hand on your shoulder, trying to comfort you.

"What...what are they saying?" You asked her, but truthfully you didn't want to know. 

Gen had a sympathetic frown on her face, distraught that she had to be the one to give you the news. "They are saying you are a home wrecker, that you were just playing each of these men, that you don't care for either. One even came out and said you were after Jensen for his money, but when he made you sign a prenup, you decided to try Misha instead."

"Those are ridiculous!!" Misha exclaimed, pacing the small patio. "If they had even met Y/N, they would know she is nothing like that!"

"We know that. Hell, even Jensen knows that. But you know the media. They think they have a good story here, and they are going to run with it, even if it's nowhere close to being true." Gen said. All the while you sat there quietly, her words repeating over and over your head.

"Maybe they're right." You whispered more to yourself than to Misha and Gen. But they heard you anyways, turning to face you in shock.

Misha came and kneeled down in front of you, grasping your cold and clammy hands. "Y/N, don't you dare believe anything they say. You're a good person, whose had to make some tough choices recently. They are just story hungry, and you're the best story out there."

"But I broke up my marriage. Doesn't that make me a bad person?" You asked.

"Things happen. Jensen understood. He might be hurting, and upset with you, but it sounded like the two of you ended things amicably." Misha tried talking some sense into you.

"Y/N, he's right. Jensen is with Jared right now. And I won't lie, he's hurting. But he did admit that he knew it was going to happen sooner or later, and that he was glad he had some time with you. Those reporters don't know what they are talking about."

You nodded, letting their words sink in and replace the nasty words the reporters had said. "But what can I do? I don't want you, or Jensen having your work ruined by this."

Gen stood up then. "I wish I could help more, but I just wanted you to know what was going on. But Jared's expecting me for breakfast with him. His families in town. But I will call you later, see what's going on, and if I can help."

You stood up, giving her a huge hug. "I'll walk you out." You told her.

The two of you were quiet on your way to the door. But when you opened it, you put your hand on her wrist, stopping her from going outside quite yet. "Gen, I really appreciate all you've done for me. And I'm sorry my life is so messed up that I haven't been there for yours. As soon as I get a little more figured out, maybe we can do something, just the two of us."

"I'd like that." She said, before climbing into her car.

You watched as she left, before heading into the kitchen where Misha was standing. You walked straight over to him, wrapping your arms around his waist, holding him close. You needed the contact, needed the reminder that you had done the right thing. Misha wrapped his arms tight around you, pressing his head down in the curve of your neck. The two of you stayed that way, needing the comfort each provided.

Misha was the first to pull back, holding you by your shoulders as he stared down at you. "We will figure this out, and we will be happy together. This is just another rock in the road, and every relationship has those. They make them stronger." 

"How did I get so lucky finding you?" You asked, stepping on your tip toes and kissing him lightly on the corner of his mouth. 

"I have no idea." He said. "But Y/N, I think we should call Jensen. The three of us need to get together, find a way to fix all of this."

You knew he was right, but you weren't sure if Jensen was ready to see you quite yet. "Do you think he will be willing to work with us?"

Misha nodded, before pulling his phone out from his pocket. "I think he will be. It's his life at stake too. Do you want to call him, or should I?"

Taking a deep breath, you thought about it. The easier route would be having Misha call him. But in your heart, you knew it should be you. "I will."

Misha nodded, understanding. I'm going to go climb into the shower. Let me know what happens." He said, before kissing your temple and leaving the room. In your heart you knew he was just giving space, and you loved him even more for it.

Going back out onto the patio, you sat down on the lounge before pulling your phone out. Jensen's number was still number one on your phone, and your thumb hovered over it. You knew you were just prolonging the torture, but you weren't ready to hear Jensen's voice. 

Feeling foolish, you pressed your thumb down, then held the phone up to your ear. Each ring sounded like a gun shot, and you wondered if he was even going to answer your call. When you had almost given up, he answered, his voice thick with sleep. "Hello?"

"Hi Jensen." You said quietly.

You heard some shuffling around, and him clearing his throat before he spoke again. "Y/N, is everything alright?"

"I take it you haven't heard the news yet." You told him, fiddling with a loose thread on the edge of your chair.

"No, I went to bed late last night, and you woke me up. What is it?" He asked, his voice tense.

Transferring the phone to your other ear, you answered him. "Gen called me this morning. The press found out, about everything. About my thing with Misha, me leaving you. You haven't been blamed, or been ridiculed. Only me. But I thought you might want to know."

"Damn it." He cussed. "The media should mind their own business."

"Jen, they're the media. It's their job. I'm just afraid of the fallback it's going to have on you and Misha. With your jobs. You rely on the media, but with good publicity. And this is far from good." You told him.

You heard him cussing, the phone held away from his face. Finally he came back on. "Listen, I think we should get together, talk about this face to face. And maybe somewhere noticeable so they can see us together."

"Yeah Misha and I were thinking we should get together too. How about at Hawksworth Restaurant. There is always paparazzi in front. Say seven?" You suggested.

"Yeah, that will work. I might even have Jared and Gen come too. The more minds together, the better. But until then, I know you Y/N. I know you are probably letting this get to you, blaming yourself. Don't. It's on all of us."

"Thanks Jensen." You said softly, relieved at how amazing he was being with all of this.

"We will figure this out. See you tonight." He said before hanging up.


	31. Armour

After your hung up from your phone call with Jensen, you stayed outside, sitting on the lounge, listening to the birds sing. That was all you could hear in Misha's backyard, the singing of birds, and in the distance the sound of someone mowing their lawn. It was amazing how quiet it was out here, how peaceful it was. You were thankful for that peace and quiet, it gave you a chance to process all that had just happened.

"How did the phone call go?" Misha asked softly from the door, before making his way out to you. In his hand he had a small plate with fruit and eggs on it. Handing it over to you, he sat down on the lounge across from you.

"Better than I expected, I guess." You told him, before picking up a piece of watermelon and munching on it. "He said he's willing to meet up with us. He's even going to get Gen and Jared to show up too."

"Good, that's good." Misha agreed, but you weren't exactly sure he was paying attention to your words.

"Misha?" You asked, staring his way, watching as his eyes moved back and forth, searching your face.

"Hmm?" He mumbled, before realizing you were waiting for him. "Sorry, I just wanted to see for myself how you were doing. You've had a lot of stuff happen to you lately, and I know it can be draining on a person."

The weight that was currently strapped down on your shoulders eased, just a little and you gave him a shaky smile.

Misha surprised you by scooting back in the lounge until his legs were stretched out. Patting his lap, he held his hand out. Not wanting to refuse his offer, you stood up, crawling into his lap. He wrapped his arm around you, pulling you close to his chest.

"Listen, I know you are probably wondering if it would have been easier to stay with Jensen, than to feel all this pain and torment." He started.

"Misha, I..." You started to argue, but he hushed you.

"But some of the best relationships, the biggest love stories, they weren't easy. But they fought to stay together, and that's what I want us to do. I love you, and we will figure this out."

Tilting your head up, your lips met Misha's halfway, turning your body so your chest was pressed against his. Wrapping his hands in your hair, he angled your face, brushing your lips with his tongue.

The two of you stayed that way, with some hot and heavy kissing before you gently pulled away from him. Laying your head on his chest, you ran your finger up and down the faded teal t-shirt he was wearing. "Misha, we are meeting Jensen at the Hawksworth Restaurant, and I didn't really bring anything nice enough to wear there."

"Just go in whatever, you'll look amazing." He said, kissing the top of your head.

"But Misha, this is important. There's always paparazzi outside, and I don't want to look frazzled or anything." You told him.

"Okay." He sighed. "Did you want to go shopping, or head back to your old place?"

"Back to my place. I'm not ready to face a lot of people yet." You decided.

"Well let's get ready and go. I don't have to work today so I can go with you."

Within ten minutes the two of you were ready to go, both dressed casually in jeans and T-shirts. Misha drove, since your jeep was still at the shop getting fixed. You didn't mind, it was nice actually being able to see the neighborhood around you now that it was light outside and you could enjoy the view. It was a quaint neighborhood, meant for starting families. It made you think of the future, and what could happen. Before you knew it Misha was pulling into your driveway, or old driveway, you muttered to yourself.

Standing by the front door, you stared up at the home that housed so many memories for you. In a way it was sad that that life was coming to an end. But you were excited to see where life with Misha would lead. Misha came around, pressing his hand against your lower back. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

You nodded, before pulling your keys out and opening the front door. It had only been hours since you had been here last, but it seemed like a lifetime away. Nothing had changed, except for you. Misha silently followed behind you as you made your way up the stairs, heading straight for your old bed room. Making your way inside, you were surprised when Misha didn't follow.

"It just seems weird." He muttered. "This was your's and Jensen's room, it was your private space. It feels wrong for me to be here."

You gave him a smile. "I understand. If you want you can wait down in the kitchen, or living room." 

He took up your suggestion, leaving you alone. Opening your closet door, you stared inside, wondering what would be the best for the night. Grabbing another suitcase, you grabbed multiple items that could work, along with shoes. Turning to your bathroom, you packed make up and other items that hadn't been grabbed last night. Shutting your suitcase, you looked back into the room one last time. It felt empty and cold, and even though you had made your choice, it still hurt to know you were putting an end to that life.

Stifling back some tears, you met Misha down below. He didn't say anything, but took your suitcase out to the car, giving you a moment to collect your thoughts. 

_________________________________________________________________

"Y/N, are you ready yet?" Misha's voice yelled from down below. "We need to leave in five!"

"Almost!" You yelled, putting on the last layer of lipstick. You looked in the mirror, barely recognizing the woman looking back. Your hair was put up in a simple french twist, with some diamond encrusted earrings dangling down. Your eyes were shadowed, and your lips a little deeper red than you normally wore. You had finally decided on a simple black dress. It had a sweetheart neckline, plunging a little lower in the back, with the skirt flaring out at the waist. It ended just above your knees, showcasing the red and black heels you paired with it. 

A simple heart shaped necklace was your only other adornment, and after spritzing yourself with perfume, you felt ready, at least as ready as you could be. Taking a deep breath, you slid your heels on before carefully heading down the stairs.

Misha was standing in the living room, a frown on his face as he checked his phone. But when he heard the little clicks your heels made as they connected with the hardwood floor, he glanced up. His phone forgotten in his hand, he stared at you, his mouth gaping open. Coming over to him, you swirled, showcasing your outfit. "How do I look?" You asked nervously, hoping you looked okay for the meeting tonight.

He swallowed thickly, before licking his lip. "You look amazing. Absolutely beautiful. But are you sure this is what you want to wear?" He asked, and the smile that had been gracing your face fell into a frown.

"Why?" You asked, a little hurt at his words.

He stepped closer to you then, placing his hand gently on your cheek. "It's not because I don't like it. I really do, I think you look gorgeous. But if Jensen sees you in this, he might want you back and fight me. And then our whole plan for tonight is out the window."


	32. The Meeting

Tapping your leg nervously, you stared straight ahead, refusing to look anywhere but the road. 

You were on your way to dinner with Jensen, and everyone else, and you were worried things would go horribly wrong.

So lost in your own though,  it took a moment for you to even realize Misha had captured your hand with his own, stopping your nervous tapping.

"Hey, calm down. It's all going to work out all right, don't worry. I will be by your side the entire time, and Gen won't let anything happen to you either." He comforted you. 

You took several deep breaths, trying to calm down. You didn't want to arrive to this dinner looking frazzled and upset. 

"Better?" Misha asked you as he manuevered into a parking spot. Nodding your head, you  pulled the shade down, checking your makeup in the mirror. 

Feeling as ready as you could be, you turned to the open door, climbing out and thanking Misha for holding it open for you. 

The restaurant was about a block away from where you parked. Taking your hand, Misha tucked it firmly in his before guiding you through the crowded sidewalk. 

The closer you got, the tighter your grip on Mishas hand became, especially when you noticed the paparazzi waiting outside. 

"Ready?" He asked, and you nodded, walking towards the restaurant. While Supernatural might not be the biggest hit out there right now, the actors were still popular, and a good romance triangle was always enough for the front page. 

You could tell the exact moment they noticed you. Flashing lights momentarily blinded you, and you almost stumbled if it weren't for the tight hold that Misha had on you. You could hear them all yelling at you and Misha, shouting questions and comments your way, but it was hard to distinguish one from another. 

"Misha, can you say a few words for us?" One voice spoke out, while another one yelled at you. "Don't you feel bad for leaving Jensen for his best friend?"

Before you could even answer, another voice rang out, and you looked up towards it, grateful for it's timing. "Misha! Y/N!" Jensen said as he came striding up to you, Jared and Gen at his back. He pulled you into a hug, before turning and slapping Misha on the back. The paparazzi went crazy, taking picture after picture, yelling at Jensen.

He turned to them, standing beside you. "I know what you're all thinking, that this is a huge mess. But it really isn't. I'm glad that Misha and Y/N were able to find each other, and I hope that we can all be friends. Now if you'll excuse us, we have a dinner reservation."

You followed behind him, into the restaurant, where the host was already ready to take you back to your table. Misha pulled the chair out for you, and you slid in, relieved to be away from all those prying eyes. "Thank you for what you said Jensen." You told him as he sat down across from you.

"Well, it's stage one to getting them off of our back." He answered.

"True, but it was a lot kinder than you needed to be." Misha replied back,  and you could still notice the tension between them. It was understandable, but it still hurt that you had come between these two friends. 

"What? Take a punch at you in front of reporters? No matter how much I want to, and believe me I do, it's not worth risking our careers over. I would rather put up a good front in front of reporters, and leave punching you until we are back on set."

You frantically looked between Misha and Jensen, trying to find signs that they would get into a fight then and there. Jensen's eyes were cold and hard, staring at Misha while Misha looked guilty and maybe a little ashamed that he had stolen his friends girl. 

"Guys..." You started to say, but Misha interrupted you. 

"Y/N, no offense honey, but this is something Jensen and I do need to get out of our system. Even if it comes to fists, which I hope it doesn't."

"That's enough." Gen said, her voice making everyone turn to look at her. "Y/N did not set up this meeting for you two to get annoyed with each other. I know Jensen has every right to be upset, but right now we need to know how to deal with the media."

Both men nodded, Misha reaching under the table to squeeze your hand. Jensen noticed, visibly flinching his jaw tensing. 

"What do we do?" Jensen asked. "Maybe meeting here was enough."

"It's a start." Jared finally said. "And what Jensen said helped too. I think they will still be out there when are leave. And I think Jensen should hug Y/N, and pat Misha on the back. That should be enough to dispel most rumors."

You nodded, smiling at Jared in thanks. By this time your food had arrived, and the five of you ate in relative silence. You kept seeing Jensen sneak sad looks your way, and you felt a little guilty at hoe happy you were while he was so heart broken.

When everyone was waiting for dessert, Jared tapped his wine glass, a huge smile on his face. "I know now is probably not the best time for this, but I can't wait any longer to let you guys, my best friends and family, know.

"What?" Both you and Jensen asked at the same time. 

Jared raised Gen's hand, showcasing an engagement ring. "I asked this wonderful woman to marry me, and she accepted! 

After much congratulations and hugs, your group decided to call it a night. Heading back out into the dark and chilly night, you got bombarded once again by the paparazzi.

"Jensen, are you just putting on a front? Tell us how you really feel?" One yelled. 

"I already told you. Its hard, losing someone you love. But I'm happy for them, and I wish them the best." He said, before giving you a hug and a kiss on the cheek. He pulled Misha in for a hug, whispering something in his ear. 

"See you tomorrow Misha." Jensen said as Gen pulled you in for a hug. 

"I think things will work them out for themselves. And maybe I can call you tomorrow, talk about wedding plans?" She asked and you nodded. 

Leaving them, you walked back to Misha's car. "How do you think it went?" You asked him, cuddling into his side. 

"Better than expected. I was truly afraid Jensen would attack me over the table." He teased. "No, I knew he would behave, and help out, Just because he still loves you." Misha finished, but you could detect a worried tone to his words. 

"Hopefully that love can turn into friendship one day. Because right now, my heart is full of love for you." You answered as he pointed the car towards home.


	33. All's Well that Ends Well

The next morning you woke up, once again with Misha's arms wrapped tightly around you. It felt amazing, but you knew he would have to get up soon, and head back to work. Turning slowly and carefully, you faced him, laughing when you saw he was already watching you.

"Morning." He told you, before kissing the tip of your nose, and you giggled.

"Back at ya." You answered, just as his alarm went off.

"Ugh, I really don't feel like going in to work today." Misha muttered, tightening his arms around you.

Laying your head on his chest, you lazily drew circles on it, knowing you needed to get off of him soon so he could get ready for work. "Is it because of the stress with Jensen?" You asked.

"That's just part of it." He answered you. "I guess the main part is the fact that you're mine now, and I want to spend more time with you."

Scooting up, you kissed him softly on the lips, before sitting up. "Don't worry, I'll be here when you get back. Just relax, and break a leg." You teased him.

Sighing, he scooted off the bed, and you enjoyed the view. He was just wearing a pair of blue boxers, and you watched as his back flexed and moved as he headed towards the bathroom. "I am afraid Jensen will do that for me." He said.

You watched over him until you couldn't see him any more, before leaning to your night stand, grabbing your phone. You were a little scared to look at it, fearing the worst. That the media would still be after your. But when you went onto Twitter, you noticed how your story had already died down, and some other celebrity was getting divorced. There were a couple of small articles, mainly talking about how cool the three of you seemed with everything, and how great of a person Jensen was to have forgiven you so easily.

Feeling a weight lifted from your shoulders, you felt a smile rise up on your face. Almost giddy, you jumped up from the bed, throwing off your tank top and shorts before surprising Misha in the shower.

_________________________________________

After a much longer than anticipated shower, you helped Misha as he rushed around the kitchen, getting ready to leave for the day. 

Grabbing a thermos, you filled it full of coffee, handing it to him as he grabbed a muffin and a banana. "So what are your plans for the day?" He asked you, as you took a sip of your own coffee.

"I was planning on just relaxing, getting used to your house a little more. I'm not ready to go through things at my old house yet." You told him, as he came forward to press a kiss to your lips.

"You are welcome to anything in the house. Consider it yours." He told you, turning to leave, and that's when you remembered your news.

"Misha!" You exclaimed, rushing after him, stopping from going outside when you realized you were only wearing his robe, and it was threadbare. "I forgot to tell you!" 

He came striding back over to you, and you knew you had to hurry so he wasn't late to work. "What is it?"

"I looked up all the media sites on social media." You started, and he frowned.

"Y/N, don't look at them, it will cause you nothing but pain. We don't need their approval." He said, before getting ready to go again.

"No, Misha. That's it. They aren't that interested in us anymore! And the one's that are, they think it's cool how friendly all three of us are. It's okay now!" You exclaimed.

You watched as your news sunk in, a smile blossoming on his face, his eyes and his nose crinkling with happiness. "Really? That's great! We should celebrate tonight!"

"Can we celebrate with a night in? Maybe movie and wine? I'd love to stay home and relax." You asked him, and he nodded.

"That sounds amazing. I'll be home fairly early tonight, and we can have a nice night in. Maybe I'll even talk you into massaging my feet." He teased, and you shook your head at his antics.

"Then it's settled. I'll run to the store today, get stuff for dinner, and a new movie. Maybe even popcorn. But you'll be doing the massaging." You replied back.

He winked at you. "I'm okay with that." He said, before sliding into his car and leaving. 

You spent the next couple of hours, giving yourself a tour of his house. You loved his place, the wide open plan, the simple but homey feel to it. Your favorite part was the backyard, and you sat out there for a while, imagining hosting BBQ's or watching your kids play there.

After a quick lunch, you took your rental car that Misha had sent over for you, driving it to the little store a couple blocks away. Wandering up and down the aisles, you grabbed your favorite items, along with stuff for dinner tonight. You wanted something simple to eat, but that still showed Misha you could handle cooking.

Your basket full, you grabbed a couple of movies, before paying. Your next stop was the liquor store, and you stood in the wine aisle forever, trying to figure out what you should get. You knew Misha preferred a red wine, and you ended up buying three different ones, wanting to make sure there was something he liked.

Finally, you made it back, getting the simple pasta sauce simmering on the stove, as you made cream puffs for dessert. You had the music blaring, and your hips were shaking along to the music. You were so intuned with what you were doing, you didn't hear the garage door open. 

A pair of strong arms wrapping around your waist, and a mouth pressing kisses along your neck had you shrieking for a quick second before you realized who it was. "Misha, you scared me." 

"Well if you weren't being so sexy." He whispered, his hands on your hips. "And if the music wasn't up so loud."

"I like listening to music when I'm cooking." You told him, as you added the filling to another cream puff.

He leaned over the sauce, smelling it. "This smells amazing!"

You pushed him out of the kitchen. "Go get comfy, dinners ready. Oh, and I got a couple of movies, pick which one you want first."

He left, and you poured the sauce over the pasta, grabbing the warm bread, placing all of it on a tray, along with a couple glasses of wine. Taking them into the living room, you saw that Misha had just beat you there, and was thumbing through the movies. Picking one, he placed it in the player, before turning and taking the tray from you.

Settling onto the soft, almond colored sofa, you handed Misha a plate, before grabbing yours. Tucking your feet underneath you, you leaned into him, ready to relax.

"So, I talked to Jensen today." He said as the previews started playing.

"And?" You asked, before taking a bite of your dinner.

"I told him our plan worked, and he was happy. He seemed okay, and at first it was a little awkward, but then everything settled back into a normal routine." He told you.

"That's good, isn't it? Everything is going to be alright." You said, relief flooding you.

He pulled you tight to him, pressing a kiss to your temple. "I think so. I know our relationship didn't start out right, but I couldn't imagine life without you in it. I love you, and I'm glad you are in my life."

"Back at ya." You teased. "I love you too. I hated hurting Jensen, but I needed to be with you. The first time I saw you, my entire life changed."

He pressed a kiss to the corner of your lips, and you laughed at the noddle hanging from his mouth. "What, what is it?" He asked. "Do I have something on my face?"

Shaking your head, you settled closer into him, happier than you had ever imagined you could be.


End file.
